Is christina from hgtv still married

Hello,
I(F25) have feelings for a man over a month. I have stalked him everywhere possible and looking into his photos everyday. Today I decided to take an action for my feelings and met with him to chit chat and see if he is also insterested in talking with me. I haven't done this for a long time for any man. Dressing up, make up, parfume everything took 2 hours.
The meeting was so nice, he was talkative and happy. Later in the conversation he mentioned that he has a wife and I felt kind of destroyed that moment and wanted to cry. Shortly after he mentioned that I left there and since then trying to deal with my feelings.
I really liked him and would like to date him if he was single. But he is not. I will never ever make any move to him anymore but I am just hurting myself. I want to forget him but my mind is blocking me because I still find him so cute, kind, handsome and smart.
How can I forget him and put my energy somewhere else 😪 I also feel like all the nice man are taken and I am lonely 😭
TLDR; Today I have learnt that the man that I have feelings is married. I have to stop thinking about him under this circumstances but my heart is so stupid. I will never ever make any move to him anymore but I am just hurting myself. How can I get rid of it?

Tonight I woke up at 3:30 am after dreaming of my ex girlfriend. We broke up over 2 years ago, and yet I feel like I’m still healing. We dated for almost 6.5 years before she left me for another dude who, as far as I know, is still with her today.
My issue is I find it very hard for me to want to date in the first place. Deep down I have this mentality that if she didn’t want to stay, why would anyone else. I know that’s a stupid statement, but I feel that’s what my subconscious is thinking. I don’t really feel “good enough” for anyone. I have a good job, and love my life as it is now, but I really miss having someone around. I’ve been on a few dates here and there, but have never been enthusiastic about any of them. I just feel like I’m still healing, and don’t know if I should just force myself to start dating to get back out there. Any advice from people similar to me is appreciated.

People are scared of Cocaine Bear, and it's offensive set can be oppressive, but there are real defensive counters to it. If it's a defensive Ursaluna there's even more defensive counters.
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This Adamant Ursaluna has 252 HP and 252 Attack. It's running Flame Orb and Guts, and it's already burned and switched in. I'm assuming everything below is cold switching into a Facade, Close Combat, or Headlong Rush. (which ever is strongest) The fourth move has been Avalanche, Fire Punch, or Crunch in my experience so your mileage may vary.
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Garchomp; 252+ Atk Guts Ursaluna Facade (140 BP) vs. 252 HP / 252+ Def Garchomp: 297-349 (70.7 - 83%) -- guaranteed 2HKO, but Garchomp can force Ursaluna out with dragon tail, and it probably took some rough skin + rocky helmet damage too. Pretty good option, and it's good against many other mons too. Avalanche is a possible fourth move so watch out for that.
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Landorus; 252+ Atk Guts Ursaluna Facade (140 BP) vs. 252 HP / 252+ Def Landorus: 306-361 (80.1 - 94.5%) -- guaranteed 2HKO. Landourus can hit back with Hammer Arm (only 46.9 - 55.3%) which might be enough to revenge kill it, or it can go for a U-Turn I suppose. Not a good option, but it might do in a pinch. Still you can bring it in on a close combat or headlong rush and either take no damage or about ~25%. Get your prediction right and you can kill. Again, like with Garchomp watch out for Avalanche.
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Forretress; 252+ Atk Guts Ursaluna Headlong Rush vs. 172 HP / 252+ Def Forretress: 195-229 (58.3 - 68.5%) -- guaranteed 2HKO. In turn Forretress can take it's other 84 evs into Speed, and outspeed Ursaluna, and then shut him down with Body Press. Surprisingly good option for how passive Forretress normally is. It's a 3HKO from Facade or Close Combat, and a well placed fire punch could kill forretress here, but in my experience fire punch is the least common fourth move.
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Orthworm; 252+ Atk Guts Ursaluna Close Combat vs. 252 HP / 252+ Def Orthworm: 252-298 (73.2 - 86.6%) -- guaranteed 2HKO. If for some reason your not eating a 38% facade, or better yet free health from a headlong rush, then close combat is what you watch out for. Body Press from the Orthworm is dealing around 50% here at it's highest, but again any rocks, rocky helmet, revenge kill, or burn chip might make this a good option. I also like this set because you could tera fairy or poison and maybe live the next Close Combat because they likely won't click facade thinking it might not kill after leftovers. Very good choice in my opinion. I'm running this right now at around 1500 OU. Fire punch would normally be a worry for most steel types, but Close Combat hits harder.
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Chesnaught; 252+ Atk Guts Ursaluna Facade (140 BP) vs. 252 HP / 252+ Def Chesnaught: 249-294 (65.5 - 77.3%) -- guaranteed 2HKO after Leftovers recovery. I've also run this and it's pretty good, but the grass typing is pretty frail in OU overall. Spiky Shield, Drain punch, and leftovers can stall out Ursaluna here. Facade is it's darn best option, and it just barely clears 75% HP. Spiky shield + leftovers + Drain Punch keeps Chesnaught going. As an added benefit packing Leech Seed makes a great defensive counter to Garganacl too as long as it isn't tera grass. Fire punch could shut you down however.
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Corviknight; 252+ Atk Guts Ursaluna Fire Punch vs. 252 HP / 252+ Def Corviknight: 198-234 (49.5 - 58.5%) -- 98.8% chance to 2HKO. It might just be the best defensive counter to the bear. Immune to Headlong Rush. and it loses less than 50% HP from both Facade and Close Combat. In Turn Corviknight can kill with Body Press on top of the burn damage. I like to equip my bird with rocky helmet and that for sure ends the bear. Again the bear could be running fire punch and that would suck, but corv is so crazy tanky theres a 2% it might be a 3HKO! Holy Hell.
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I also want to mention that no Attack investment or a non Adamant nature Ursaluna turns some of these examples from possible 2HKOs into possible 3HKOs or even 4HKOs! Other options for taking down the bear include Red Card on anything mentioned above. Defensive bear certainly has less bite than offensive but either way there are many defensive counters here and it only gets better with prediction on those ground attacks and normal attacks. Ghost and Flying Types, as well as Levitate users, all have a chance to get in eat a whiff, and punish. This is hardly a defensive counter however, but sometimes offense is best. Mons like Mismagius, any Rotom, Bronzong, the Lake Trio, Cresselia, H-Braviary, Ting Lu, Hippowdon, Houndstone, Walking Wake, & Chien Pao are much more risky as many can still be OHKO'd by something but have options for their team like Destiny Bond (RIP), Skill Swap (works really nice here, but very niche), Whirlwind or Roar (buh-bye) or in some cases outright kill as an offensive option on the right sets.
Defensive Ursaluna has tons more offensive counters that can switch in on tons of it's movesets and kill with a special attack. Maybe Assault Vest Ursaluna will become more popular than it's Guts variant. So far I haven't really seen any AV Bears.

Chapter 1
I want to share my story here because I know that reading such texts can really help people with DPDR (look at chapter 2 point 2 as it can also have contradictory effects).
My DPDR started 4 years ago, just before the beginning of the COVID-19 epidemic. It didn't occur due to drug use, marijuana, or childhood traumas. That's still the strange part for me. I don't really know what caused my DPDR.
The first thing I distinctly remember is looking in the mirror until I no longer felt that I looked at myself but someone else. I was immediately shocked and felt disconnected from my body, experiencing depersonalization, I started jumping up and down to regain the feeling of "me," but it didn't work.
All of this happened in the middle of the exam period, so maybe that had something to do with it: stress, exhaustion, etc.
From a young age, I've always been someone who pondered deep philosophical questions about life. At the age of 7, I ran downstairs from my bed crying, saying, "Mom, Dad, I'm too young to die," or "Mom, Grandpa shouldn't die." I was already wondering if there was something after death, but I realized that most likely there's just nothing, and that scared me.
During the period when my first DPDR symptoms appeared (age 15), I was also asking deep questions like: What if there was nothing—no life, no planet Earth, no universe? What are we? What is the purpose of our existence? DPDR only made this worse.
One very dark night with severe derealisation, I was thinking about existential questions like these and had a panic attack. I went downstairs to tell my parents that I couldn't sleep. Just for clarity, I hadn't done this since I was 10 or 11 years old. I never talked to my parents about my feelings or problems, so this was a very special event.
Luckily, my mom was there to comfort me, and I went back upstairs. But it didn't get better—I was still thinking about why there is something(the world/universe) and who I am. I completely lost the sense of "self"; I didn't know who I was. When I looked at myself, there was another person, even my thoughts didn't seem like mine. I wasn't my body, my mind, etc.
After lying there for what I thought were 2-3 hours, I went back downstairs to tell my parents that I still couldn't sleep, and then my dad said, "But you've only been upstairs for 5 minutes." Then I really thought I was fucked up in my mind, I didn’t know about DPDR back then.
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Luckily I haven't experienced anything as severe since then.
Knowing that there was this thing called DPDR really comforted me, by knowing that I wasnt losing my mind and that there were more people experiencing this.
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Chapter 2
Now I'm going to tell you what helped me recover from DPDR. First and foremost, I want to give some disclaimers. Everyone is different, and I'm not a medical or psychological expert. I'm just sharing what worked for me, and I hope it can work for you too.
1.
This video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-xjLSNdu2w
This really helped me; it resonated with my experience, and when the Ryan said, "There is nothing actually wrong with you," it reassured me completely.
In today's technologically advanced world, everyone is looking for a magic pill that instantly cures them, BUT IT DOESN'T EXIST.
2.
As mentioned in the video, STOP WATCHING VIDEOS ABOUT OR READING ABOUT DPDR, STOP ALL INFO ABOUT IT.
Stop imposing DPDR on yourself, stop obsessing over it. Let go and stop giving a fuck. There's nothing wrong with you; you're just anxious. Stop caring. Erase your watch history and every DPDR video recommendation on TikTok, YouTube, and all social media. This really helped me. You will get better!!
3.
Exercise, go outside, feel the wind, the birds, the trees,... Begin to reconnect with the world again. If DPDR comes to mind, acknowledge it, say that you're okay with it, and tell it to fuck off so you can go on with your life.
Same as with you'r feelings, acknowledge them if you're angry you're angry, if you're sad you're sad, feel again!!!
Stop being afraid of DPDR; it won't kill you. Tell it to fuck off.
4.
SLEEP, SLEEP, SLEEP, and SLEEP.
Stop watching videos in your bed! Get a minimum of 8 hours of sleep or even more. Stay committed, sleep well. Sleep should be the number one priority in everyone's life. Your body and mind will thank you.
If you want to learn more about sleep, listen to this podcast with Matthew Walker: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pwaWilO_Pigits (also available on Spotify).
This one really helped me, maybe even the most.
The cool thing is that I didn't have DPDR in my dreams. So i loved being asleep, but because of my excistential crisis's at night I hated falling asleep.
SO just sleep, it's important!
5.
Go to a therapist.
Talk about it, even if it's with family or someone close to you. Just talk about it; it will help you! Consider seeing a therapist. For me, it really helped calm me down, reassured me that it's okay to have these feelings, and made me stop stressing about it.
However, after she comforted me, I felt like it was holding me back. I became derealised when i went to her, same effect as Pavlov's dog if you know what I mean.
6.
Carry on with your life; don't let DPDR stop you. Remember that it's okay to have DPDR sometimes. I haven't completely recovered from DPDR myself, and sometimes I have more intense periods. For me, it usually happens due to stress.
I'm currently getting my driver's license, and sometimes I experience severe DPDR in the car, while other times I don't. Just don't give it a chance to overpower you. Tell it to fuck off and forget about it.
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That's it.
Let this be the last article/video/everything you search for about DPDR.
Even if the Reddit group triggers your DPDR, I recommend not following it anymore.
And just like “Ryan Monte” said, "Stop caring about it; you will get over it quicker than you think!"
Stay strong!

recently i played with some dude who obviously had a 2nd I:S account (he was like 40 lvl on this one)
enemy team blamed him a cheater, but i watched him, because i played against cheater and he was dumb af, but this dude was not
he knew some good paths, his movement, loadout was interesting
(about loadout, he runned with ONLY main gun, then picked enemy guns, the reason i think is speed + enemy won't recognize u by weapon sound, also, it's fun :D )
so, what i learned from him: 1) the best way to move is run + jump then spam crouch, not sure about speed boost, but it distracts enemy who is shooting u (literally saved me a few times) (it's like a cs 1.6 mwheel scrolling lol)
what i knew already: 1) u can "red zone dive"; u have like 8 seconds to shoot and do whatever u want 2) u can't shoot while jumping, but still can shoot when falling 3) u can fast resupply by pause/unpause 4) u can give yourself a good speedboost by running + melee attacking while in the edge of any height (u will "dash" forward in 2x speed) 5) u can jump on some obstacles by jump + crouch (like in source games lol)
5,5) it's very 50/50 trick, but u can down your fov to 75 and freely live with iron sights & 1x scopes (i played 2013 ins like this, so my habit was stronger, i tried 90 fov and higher but it was frustrating; thinking about lowering fov to a minimum but idk, i'm kinda used to 75)
and some of the simple not obvious: 1) u can start running asap after reloading when u saw new mag/clip/etc. icon 2) u can cancel gas mask by its hotkey after ~0.5 sec.
and the trash one: 1) underbarrel shotgun + laser is well combined
what i can't understand, is how he "skipped" post-melee-attack-slow after "dash", i could find this replay and show you some of this later, because i think i'm missing something
i think he somehow cancelled melee attack at the end, but idk how
(i'm 100% sure i missed something)
so, which tricks do you know?
p.s. — i hope it will become a some kind of discussion 'bout not obvious game mechanics, strategies, etc., have fun!

Mornings suck. I wake up from a relatively peaceful sleep (I know I am lucky for that), and reality crashes down. Even as my WP does “all the right things”, mornings just get me. Sometimes I’m sad, but more often I’m still mad. Not even at him - just everything. And I worry it’s going to sabotage R - I know it’s his responsibility to go through this with me if he wants to be worthy of R, and he is, but I still worry.
Beyond that though, I don’t even think it’s healthy or good for me either - I’m distracted for hours into the work day, and it’s not like it’s productive or useful. I know it’s part of the process, but I don’t know - it’s like it’s a habit now. I just don’t think bringing it up everyday, before the day has really started, is a good thing for me. But it just leaps out. Whereas the rest of the day, I’m prepared to observe intrusive thoughts and just let them float off, because they don’t serve me.
I’ve been to therapy on and off for years; I know so many coping strategies for a brain on the run. But this is a different battle altogether. How do you get through the mornings (or evenings, or whenever)?

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I'm going to get a lot of hate for this take but your tears sustain me. That said, let's try to keep the discussion open and respectful.
Here's my conundrum when it comes to Solomon's wisdom. It has more to do with how his wisdom was attained and its implications. Wisdom doesn't strike me as an attribute that can be given, like wealth. I could be wrong about that. Wisdom to me is created in its absence. The pain and problems we experience change our perspectives, behaviours, values and decisions, thus creating a wiser person. As far as I know, Solomon didn't experience the character arch that leads to wisdom. Wisdom was merely handed to him. And that leads to my question; was this wisdom or was this simply an abundance of knowledge?
Many of the stories used to vouch for Solomon's wisdom to me seem to be cases of him having vast knowledge, trickery, sometimes even just common sense. The areas where his wisom could and should have shone through but didn't are strangely ignored as well. A wise man would know that fornicating with thousands of women would have severe repercussions, let alone anger the god that has blessed you with all you have. A wise man would know that adopting the gods of your mistresses would have severe repercussions, let alone anger the god that has blessed you with all you have.
He's written books with a lot of wisdom, some books even with advise to young men teaching them how to relate with themselves and others but oddly enough even he didn't take his own advise. It's almost like he had God given knowledge, which explains how he knew all that he knew (which was a lot) but was somehow still lacking in wisdom, which explains the mistakes he made.
I'm not saying this to discredit the man. I have great respect for him. I'm just curious, was this knowledge or wisdom? If it was wisdom, what separates him from the likes of Christ, Budhaa, Krishna, heck even Tesla, to make him the wisest man to ever live? What to you was the one incident that proved Solomon's God given wisdom?

Using my main account instead of a throwaway, but idgaf
In a bit of a crisis right now. I feel like I'm spiraling and breaking down all week because of this. I even did more intense workouts at the gym and went cycling/swimming for longer distances to forget about it but somehow this lingering feeling always comes creeping back...
Do you ever feel like you wish you were born a different person? Yes, I realize that a lot of people would kill to be in my shoes right now. But little do they know that I would kill to be in theirs. A lot of people think I'm "special", a rare Pokémon if you will. All throughout my life, people find me intimidating because of it.
I wish this wasn't the case. I just wish I was a normal person who grew up with a normal childhood and not the fucking circus freak that I am today. I wish I wasn't born with very Asian parents who pushed me to not only achieve and excel, but to be THE BEST - and this ultimately became my life's obsession at the expense of everything else. I wish I wasn't this basket case of mental health issues that I developed from decades of bullying, parental abuse, rejection, and unmet expectations. I wish I wasn't born neurodivergent. Which comes with superpowers of its own when it comes to hobbies and careers, but believe me, the tradeoff of turning you into a social fuckup isn't worth it.
Most of all, I wish I didn't waste my youth by taking life too seriously. Being a social recluse for pretty much all my life turned me into a "polymath" of sorts and advanced me in my careers and other personal goals, but at what cost? Crippling social anxiety, depression, and loneliness? It came to a point where being good at things became pretty much became my entire personality. Honestly, I'd give this all up just to be less socially inept and still with friends who actually care about me and what I'm up to in my day-to-day life.
Recently, I went out drinking and clubbing and turns out that I actually had a good time - yes, I know, very odd for a nerdy introvert like me. A lot of the skills I have that had nothing to do with socialization turned out to be pretty good party tricks that I can use to my advantage. So I thought to myself - why didn't I do more of this when I was younger? I wish I partied more, got shitfaced more, did recreational drugs, had good times with people, made more friends, made out with randos at the bar, lost my virginity earlier, upped my body count more, learned to be a better dancer, and as a result became better at social skills overall to be a more likeable person.
This is the wasted youth I wish I had instead of the wasted youth I actually have. Maybe if I did all of this then I wouldn't be this boring square with nothing to show for that I am today.

I got a computer a bit back that was originally an offsite backup server that ran for a few years. I’m thinking I’ll use it as a server, I just want to see if I could be an ok PC. I want to try and get the cheapest parts that won’t be needlessly powerful, but still make it run better than before.
Here's the specs: Motherboard: Asus M3A78-EM (I believe, I can’t see the PC right now) CPU: AMD Athlon 64 x2 6000+ GPU: Integrated NVIDIA GeForce 8300 (It’s part of the motherboard) PSU: DLT350AB8A RAM: 4 2GB DDR2 Casing: HP m7000 Hard drives: a 750 GB one and an 8 TB archive one. It has 5 SATA 2 slots and I believe all of them work
I do have 250 GB SSD I could install and speed up disk speed quite a bit. It's currently running Ubuntu and really struggles opening Firefox. It also starts to break the wallpaper when it has to open things like Firefox. I believe it would benefit from a better GPU, as I’m guessing that’s why the wallpaper is the thing to break. As for processing power I'm unsure, how much does it need a new CPU? I found a good one that has 3.2 GHz and 6 cores, compared to 3.0 GHz and 2 cores. I have it written down somewhere but I believe it’s the AMD Phenom II x6 1090t, which the Asus website said it supported. I just don’t know if upgrading to that one would do too much, or if the memory would cause some sort of bottleneck that would prevent that from helping it much. When I run the activity monitor it shows the ram running at about 10% before the CPU hits 100%, but I think that the CPU is having to also handle some of the GPU stuff or something. I may be completely wrong, I was just wondering what the best upgrades and fixes would be if I were to add them and how much I should expect that to improve it. I also may be reading the activity monitor wrong, as it’s displaying 2 CPUs and I’m just assuming one is the GPU. Thanks for any help you can give

As if to prove me capable, my new FP is someone i have to be platonic with.
They have admitted to recent acts that are unacceptable; however it sounds no one was hurt and they want to change.
Fine. So long as they're my FP they will see improvement; as the side effect of my attention tends to be. However this has gaurenteed, without a doubt, as if to ensure something for us both, there will be nothing non platonic.
If i can change, so can they.
Notice how with my marks as guidance, you know what to avoid now?
Sure, only I am allowed to have made those marks and barely at that- And i do feel remorse for how severe some of them are- accidents in the heat of passion -
But thats how I know you're safe when you're not in my care. The only way to ensure your safety when I knew you'd be away from me until we're properly ready- not just a sneak peak to save each others lives -
We're plan Z babe. You and I.
We'll get there eventually, and eventually we'll stop filling in the rest of the alphabet, or we'll have no choice- it doesn't matter. We are a constant in each other's lives.
No matter how hard we try there will be nothing we can do to truly lose eachother.
I've recently adjusted settings; your number is now set to ring in DND and im no longer putting my phone on silent when i sleep- and only for you. I made the mistake ofnhaving my ringer on silent the ither night when you needed me and I've not let that failure down.
Becuase i know it's emergency only for now, do not hesitate to call, ever.
I'm glad you're back on path. Im happy for you. You're silly in your games. Im sorry i made you do something you didn't want to, still, however, you recognize this as a side effect of your strategy, right?
Clearly you must- given you've already made sure im...still here.
We have our strategies. We needed to perform emergency adjustments on eachother. I've only met one other whom i knew their time wasn't over in my life after our first engagement- and i know for a fact their place has been long done too. My initial reading on necessary and karmic relationships. Incidentally, soul mate, my current fp- im completely sure is a karmic relationship. Im sure yours is too. You're going to have your relationship virginity taken by a man; its gonna be dissatisfying in the end Because Its Not Me (trust me i know the feeling) but you're gonna learn why it was so important to me for you to experience it and you're going to be ready for me to show you how I love.
And you're never going to regret it.
Goodbye, temporarily, my dearest.
May your relationship be fulfilling and your heart always feel longing.

29F here. Doing a LIFE re-evaluation and declutter. So far, I've tossed a ton of clothes that I bought in myearly 20s to fit my mom's mould of a young professional. Cue "Mother knows best" song from Tangled. LOL
My physical wardrobe is NOT flexible. I have multiple copies of the same thing.But I'm traveling, and I got rid of most things that were dupes and unnecessary.
So here I am looking at the next phase: digital declutter. I'm still not done with the physical, but there's nothing more on me to declutter. I packed my clothes to my 30L bag. I can do a final purge on the last day (7/2).
But- my big bottleneck now is DIGITAL stuff. I almost don't know where to start!!!!!!!!
I have at least 6 email accounts. I have tons of photos stored on various phone devices and the cloud. I have 4 laptops on me (they all suck for various reasons and were a money sink).
I have a pair of headphones that are subpar. I have 2 cell phones that suck (for various reasons).
I have some adapters, multiple HDMI cables.
A smart watch (that is uncomfortable).
Laptop charging cables.
And that's the PHYSICAL.
The digital portion of it is a well.
There's GOOGLE, MICROSOFT, FACEBOOK, AMAZON, DISCORD, etc.
Unfortunately, I deleted my discord, but my crazed comments are still online. Also DELETING stuff makes me feel sick. TT^TT
The internet just makes me feel sick. I share private thoughts with a certain community or person, but it can be shared, and is sold and everything.
I don't know how to get over that feeling just yet.

I feel fine, I dont feel angry, I dont think I feel sad? I just had an argument with my mum again (we have arguments very often) and i had to go up and cry. She was arguing how I dont do prayers, how impulsive I am and how my brother learns from what he does and I dont. She said she was justified im hitting me when i was younger and that she is allowed to hit me cause im her child and that in islam she wont be sinned for it, but if children hit back they would. I still feel fine, but why am I crying?? I dont understand I hate this. Having to deal with this and then my only best friend ignoring me is really driving me insane

basically, everything is terrible. i am so incredibly upset that my mh ruined good things in my life. my dpdr episode, a year ago, that lasted 5 months, ruined my fucking life and self esteem. i have always struggled with anxiety and mi but this (dpdr) was something that completely shattered me.
i went to college & graduated on the dean’s list. i was an aspiring preschool teacher. i was excelling in my career working with children. i had wonderful coworkers and bosses. i was so so proud of myself. my bosses loved me.
but trauma and burn out caught up to me & i couldn’t keep up with responsibilities of work and school. my bosses, initially supportive, stopped believing in me. i’m only 23 and burnt out. i was sobbing in my bosses office and getting asked if i am okay. i dissociated everyday for months- even at work. i took a leave of absence but it wasn’t enough.
god, it all feels like such a huge loss having to leave a job i very much loved. i was financially stable.
i’m a very broken, hollow version of myself. i can barely keep conversation and sleep is 95% of what i do daily- it’s the only thing that feels good. i love my boyfriend but i feel emotionally disconnected. i feel like he will leave me if i continue to be mentally ill. my mother is an alcoholic, i still live at home and witnessing this is so exhausting.
i started a new job with the company that my mom works with & i feel like i’m going to disappoint her. my job is talking to disabled people and i can barely make normal conversation. i took the job because my mom was upset i was unemployed. i tried other jobs but i either didn’t get chosen after the interviews (i was dissociated), fired, didn’t show up for the interview, or walked out after a few days. it felt physically impossible to be a normal, sociable, alert person and worker.
i was removed from my university yesterday for inactivity. i’m in crippling debt from impulsive credit card usage. i have $5 to my name. my car payment is nearly 3 months overdue. if my car gets repoed, i’ll lose it.
i’m a lazy, crybaby, mentally ill, user. my body and mind are broken. yes, i went through trauma & it was 5 years ago but i can’t fucking move on like everyone else. i did therapy, medication and i need more therapy but i’m broke.
thoughts of dying are absolutely raging and i don’t have anyone to talk to rn. It feels like there is no help in the world.

Soooo for a long time I had a dream.. and that dream was to build ultimate healer ranger sooo I brainstormed and asked on some subreddits and talked with most experienced friend form my DnD group. So here it is: Mark of Healing Halfling ( because of that extra healing spells ) 4 levels of tief rogue for healing kit & healer feat and after that ( maybe ) 4 levels of Banneret fighter , 1 level dip in Life Cleric ( for goodberry combo ) and after that 11 levels in Drakewarden Ranger I would like to change up a bit the Drake’s breath ( 8d6 dexsave half as much on failed ) I would like to change it from dealing damage to healing maybe not 8d6 coz that’s too much but maybe 8d4 ( idk it still needs balancing ) ? And half as much on failed medicine check from teammates? I have great story reasons for this character and why it is like this so what do you think how much would the class abilities overlap and what should I change ? ( I can share the story behind this character if you want )

I started liking a girl in my college two months ago. I am in pre-final year. She is my classmate but in other section.
I had crush on her since last year. I wanted to tell her things. I told her. She did not react in favour. But continued to be friends.
I called her clg today, it was holiday but she came. I asked if we can be together in future. She is of different religion and I am from India. Here religion is a big factor to be considered😅.
She is a very religious girl. Today, she told that she like a boy. I said I asked u that if u have a boyfriend. She said I like him and he is married.
She is 21 and that boy is around 27.
I asked if she is doing right and it could hamper his married life. She said "mai kya hi baat krti hu usse" (what can I talk to him). She just meets him sometimes and they are not intimate.
She said sorry. Will meet during exams. And went.
I was in shock as it is extremely rare to find such things here.
I am little bit sad also. But I am impressed with her dedication. She said I try to understand everyone but nobody understands me🥺
Just wrote to vent out.
If somebody has views what can I do to not feel bad about it.

Just finished replacing parts on my computer, in total I switched power supplies, repasted the CPU, and removed the SSD (I had a M2 drive and SSD in the system, I took out the SSD) I launched the system everything worked fine, installed windows, windows said restarting.. then on restart it refuses to display anything, I can still get it to display bios, and i can launch from usb to try to install windows again, but no matter what I try it refuses to go any further than that.
Attempted fixes: Reinstalled several times, Removed the Graphics Card, unplugged everything from the USB slots, tried switching from the 4K cable to the HDMI cable, and tried redownloading the windows installer and running it fresh.. nothing is working it just keeps launching, then stopping display alltogether

About the Character: Mai'el is an opportunistic succubus who believes she has found an exploitation in demonic law; There are no consequences to breaking the law! To collect as many followers and souls as she wants, she will use restricted techniques only allowed for special situations, including hypnosis. To ensure her plan works, she seeks out her favorite mortal man, saving him for a special occasion.
Before she tries hypnotizing him, she decides to indulge herself with some conversation and snuggling before consuming her favorite human's soul. It'll be the last chance she gets after all.
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All sound effects are encouraged, but still optional.
Feel free to change the dialogue to your liking, or even completely improvise. Whatever you need to make the lines feel more natural. What matters is keeping the general story the same.
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You may absolutely monetize this, but if you should place this product behind a paywall, I would appreciate a copy of the performance.
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Feel free to ask any questions or bring up any concerns, should they come up. Feedback is very welcome!
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Context: You lay comfortably in bed, deep asleep, until a chill runs up your spine. You wake to the feeling of being watched. To your horror, you can't command your body to move. Try as you might, you can only helplessly watch as an alluring form makes her way into the edge of your vision. With a devious smile, someone lays on top of you, eying you like her prey.
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[The sound of the succubus sneaking across the room before laying on top of the listener (floorboards creaking, bed springs squeaking, covers ruffling, etc.)]
Mai'el: "Hey there... You don't mind if I lay here, do you? [Giggle] Your... 'Cheeks' are telling me you don't mind, and your eyes are telling me you're not sure if you're dreaming. [Kiss] I'm very real, baby. Shhhh... Don't struggle. It'd be a waste of your attention. Your body is still asleep, but I left your head awake so you could keep me company."
[Listener: "What's happening?"]
Mai'el: "What's happening? I'm so glad you asked! I've been dying to share this with someone.
Have you heard of a 'sleep paralysis demon'? How about a succubus? We're both the same thing. [Sigh of comfort] Oo, you're so nice to snuggle up to! [Brief moment as she enjoys holding the listener] Normally we can only do our jobs as a sleep paralysis demon or a succubus, but not both. Nooo... That would be against the 'rules'. [Self-amused chuckling] But I think that's inefficient. We're born to take souls and spread our influence. But that takes so long if we go 'by the book'. First you weaken strong souls by scaring them with nightmares or paralyzing their body. Then you seduce their with 'good dreams', or with our unrivaled 'assets'. Then, when they're nice and obedient, you get them to submit their life to you, offering their service or their soul... But that doesn't always work. So souls become hard to come by all because some precious 'rules' need to be respected."
[Succubus takes a moment to give the listener affection (brushing their hair, pawing at them, kissing, stroking their face, et.)]
Mai'el: "Speaking of 'respect', you haven't interrupted me once! Oh, I knew you would be the right choice... [Seeing the surprise and confusion on his face] Yesss. I chose you! You're not some random prey. If I'm going to do this, I'm going to go for the mortal at the top of my list."
[Succubus gives a sigh as she admires the listener.]
Mai'el: [Suddenly remembering] "Oh right! Where was I? The rules, right? Well, we're all told that breaking the rules will corrupt our souls. [Annoyed] Corrupt. Demon souls. I swear I'm either the smartest one down there, or everyone else is too scared to realize you can't 'corrupt' a corrupted soul... [Calming down] Which bring me here to you, my flame.
I am going to bask in my genius with each mortal I dominate. I am going to gorge myself silly on the adoration and souls of more than I've seen in years, all in one evening!... But I'm skipping straight to dessert first. And don't you look tasty... [Affectionate sound of a kiss or lick]"
[The sound of fabric moving as the succubus sits up.]
Mai'el: [Moving her clothes with a giggle] "Sorry, baby. These clothes don't offer much room for pockets. I was pulling out this candle. Not the girls. Its for the hypnosis... Though I'm sure you'd pay close attention to me no matter what I pulled out of my top. [Playful laughter]"
[Listener: "Hypnosis? Don't I need to willingly make a deal?"]
Mai'el: "Hm? Well look at you! Not just a pretty face either. But I already knew that.
To answer your question, and happily spread out the details for you to take in; You're right. Demons aren't allowed to use hypnosis! Why?... [Playfully annoyed] Because the rules say so! [As if the listener agreed with her] I know! What a pain! And we've been doing this for thousands of years. Blindly!
[Letting of a content sigh] But we both know how I feel about the rules. But let me let you in on a fun little fact about hypnosis. You can't force someone to do something they wouldn't want to. Its just an encouraging nudge. And I know somewhere in you, you want to make me happy... [Becoming genuine] And I admit, this isn't how I wanted to win your favor. I didn't want your service, or your soul. I never did. That's why I've left you alone this whole time. I loved seeing you as you are. I loved feeling your passions and desires. I loved your ideals and mannerisms. I loved... [Conflicted, her voice gets caught in her throat before she can finish her sentence.]
[Regaining her composure] Which makes you the perfect person for me to try this out on.
Come, my flame. Let me light my candle for you. [The sound of her blowing gently and the candle igniting with a flame.] You can close your eyes if you want, but I just need your attention. I promise you I'm more interesting to look at than the backs of your eyelids."
Mai'el: [Beginning the hypnosis with a comforting or sultry tone] "Listen closely to my voice. Hear my words reach for you. They yearn for your embrace. Let my message take warm comfort in a place in your mind.
Feel my gaze touch you and explore you. It studies you closely like a treasure map, excited to find what lies beneath. Greedy for the valuables your conceal.
Let my presence into your heart, and surround my being with your love. Soothe my aching desires with your earnest aid. Hold me in your arms to cherish me, and to protect me.
I welcome your soul into me. Let it rest upon my chest, and feel a care and affection beyond your very imagination. Embolden yourself and unshackle your mind from what binds you to your plane. Let your spirit willingly find me, happy to serve. Eager to please. Truly devoted."
[The succubus takes a long deep breath, then blows out the candle.]
Mai'el: [Pleased and excited] "Well? How do you feel? Happier to be around me? Comforted by me presence? I know I feel better after that.
Is that what meditation is like?"
[Listener: "I don't think I feel any different."]
Mai'el: [Slightly disappointed] "Huh? Nothing?... Hm. Well, it's not supposed to make you a different person. It just stimulates what's already there, after all. [Flirty giggling] Did you enjoy me 'stimulating' you? [Kiss] I know I enjoyed myself." [Letting out a sound of delight as she snuggles with the listener.]
[Listener: "Does this mean I'm going to die?"]
Mai'el: [Surprised, concerned, and defensive] "What!? Are you going to die?! No! No, of course not, my flame! That was just hypnosis! I would never try to hurt you!... [Noticing something is off] I... I mean... Once you give me your soul you'll... Um... [Frustrated] Oh, by the nine Hells! What was I thinking?"
[Redirecting her attention back to the listener]
Mai'el: "You have to believe me. I would never try to hurt you!"
[The listener repeats what she said she would do.]
Mai'el: [Embarrassed] "Y-yes. I did say I would take your soul, among others, but- What is wrong with me? Why would I-? [Taking a deep breath to recompose herself] Because I can get around the rules. The value of a soul gives power in any Hell. Servants can help me get things done on the surface while I'm away... [Groaning] None of that seems worth it though. Not if it means hurting the one I love... [More serious upon remembering something] Wait... The rules. Corrupting a demon's soul. I tried to hypnotize you, but you seem unaffected. But I... What made sense to me mere minutes ago suddenly seems so... Wrong!"
Mai'el: [Returning her attention to the listener, nervous.] "Baby? Do I seem... Different to you?... No... I can see it in your eyes already. Something did change. Is this the corruption? Did I accidentally hypnotize myself? Wait! Why do I still have you paralyzed? I'm so sorry!" [The magic is quickly undone.]
Mai'el: "I'm just so confused, I... [Listener speaks to her] Wha-? N-no, I'm not in any pain. Why?... Huh? W-well, yes, I did say hypnosis can't force someone to do something against their will... No. I guess, either way, nothing bad happened. [Less nervous, and stunned by what she heard] Wait. What did you say? What do I want? I... Um... The souls, so I could... [Regret in her voice] I wanted the souls so I could be happy... ... [Soft chuckle] Um... Yeah. I guess even before this happened, I was very happy. [Sweetly] I was finally with you after all... Yeah, I guess I still am, aren't I?... [Alarmed] Stay with you?! I can't do that! Why would you want that after what I tried to do to you?... ... Tch! I suppose you make a good point. If I wanted to hurt you, I wouldn't have unbound you. [Sigh] If I wanted to hurt you, I wouldn't have bothered talking to you in the first place. I would have just tried hypnotizing you... OK, that's true. I was going to hurt you after I hypnotized you, but I wanted to spend time with you first... But I still can't stay with you. I'm sorry. Nothing would make me happier than that right now, but its against the rules to form romantic relationships with morta- Oh, by the nine hells! Why am I such an idiot? I have to be the stupidest one down there!... Hey! Don't laugh! [Failing at trying to be mad] Its not funny! I- Yes, the rules have been in place for thousands of years! Demons don't have the vision that humans do, OK? We're pretty bad at planning ahead. [Laughing]"
Mai'el: [After enjoying a good laugh, she recollects herself] "Are you sure you want this? You know this could be a trick, right? We're pretty good at tricking people... Ugh! We're bad at planning ahead, but we're not that bad! We do a lot of planning on the fly... I mean it; Are you sure?... [Shocked] I what?! How did you know I love you though?... Be-besides just now... When I said I couldn't hurt the one I love. Wow. I didn't even think about what I was saying.
[A sigh of relief and joy] Yeah... I've been crushing on you for a while now. In Hell I can even hear your thoughts, so I got to know who the real you is too... You perv. [Laughing] I'm sorry! I'm a succubus, baby! But I really do find all of your desires and passions attractive. Not just those kind."
Mai'el: [Softly] "Hey. Kind of like that. Yeah. It doesn't take powers to see you're still tired. I kind of woke you up pretty rudely... If... If you want, I could keep you company. I want to stay, but I need to go back eventually. Not for long though. Before that, can- With your permission this time, can I snuggle up with you for the night?... Yeah? Thank you so m- [Succubus is kissed]"
Mai'el: "O-oh! [Giggle] Thank you... Hm? My name? Of course I don't mind. I just didn't realize I didn't tell you yet. It's Mai'el. Kind of like, 'its not your L, its my L'. You can call me Mai, if you'd like though! [Soft giggle] You look so sleepy. [Both lay down together, ushering Mai'el into a peaceful state.] I wanted you to hold me in your arms like this earlier... I didn't think I'd be able to do this. I'm glad this happened though... Thank you, my flame. Sleep well..."

I’ve spent the last few years with everything basically sucking. I realized I was grieving something from the past and moved on from limiting narratives. It made things a bit easier but not really better. Then something happened. And then something ended. I think. I was being stupid but I don’t care. I made the right decision but it may have hurt me more than anything ever has. Now everything sucks again. Everything is boring and pointless now, just as it was before. Anyway here’s some shitty poem verses I just wrote. I’m tired…
Two weeks Two weeks was all Saved from the murk But back there I fall I thought it would work
The slabs The slabs said it was so I’d reason to doubt But “onward I go” ‘Course now I just pout
Regrets Regrets I have few I know little else What else could I do? I wanted to melt
Move on Move on would be best For sticking around While noble a quest Will never be sound
Move on Move on while I’d feel Such palpable guilt? I choke out a squeal “Destroy what we’ve built?”
Did you? Did you mean all you said? Still mean it now? Doesn’t have to be dead If we just stick around
Moved on Moved on, if you have Then easier still I briefly may calve But move on I will
You’re gone You’re gone so it seems Though technically here Approaching our dreams It’s just disappeared
The first The first one for me You’ll always have dibs Will always feel slimy On wrong people’s ribs
Perfect Perfect it would be Astoundingly matched Yet timing ain’t free There’s always a catch
I may elaborate if I get responses or feedback.

Hey all!
Recently upgraded my GPU from a 1060 to a 4070Ti, and I'm super happy with the upgrade! The only bump in the road has been my monitor setup. I use three, and one of them is quite old (got it for free, but it works well as a vertical display.) This old monitor only has VGA support, and the 4070Ti doesn't. "No problem," I thought. I orderer an adapter from VGA to DisplayPort and plugged it in.
While Windows detects it, the monitor simply shows "No Signal." I tried basic troubleshooting, switching ports, and all of them work. My other two monitors both use DisplayPort natively and have no issues.
Obvious culprit became the adapter, but I have a laptop with a DisplayPort slot, so I tried plugging it into there, and it worked fine going from Laptop (DP) -> Adapter (DPtVGA) -> Monitor (VGA).
I've installed Nvidia's latest drivers on my main PC, but it didn't make a difference. Both Windows Settings and NVIDIA Control Panel recognise the connected display, but I'm still not getting any signal.
Ideas? Thank you for your time.