Strive physical therapy and sports rehabilitation

This is what I have learned after 30 years of living with chronic fatigue. These ten focus points have helped me. Maybe they will help you too.
[1. Pacing] The first suggestion is pacing. It's essential to balance rest and activity to avoid overexertion and prevent symptom flare-ups. Remember that pacing is not about doing less, but about finding a sustainable balance that allows you to maintain your quality of life. Listen to your body, and don't push yourself too hard.
[2. Sleep hygiene] The second suggestion is sleep hygiene. It's crucial to establish a regular sleep schedule, create a relaxing bedtime routine, and maintain a sleep-conducive environment. Quality sleep can help manage your symptoms and improve your overall well-being.
[3. Stress management] The third suggestion is stress management. Stress can exacerbate symptoms of ME/CFS, so it's crucial to find ways to manage it. Consider meditation, deep breathing exercises, or mindfulness practices to help manage symptoms.
[4. Gentle exercise] The fourth suggestion is gentle exercise. Low-impact exercises like stretching, yoga, or tai chi can help improve physical function and well-being gradually. Always listen to your body and adjust the level of intensity as necessary.
[5. Nutrition] The fifth suggestion is nutrition. A balanced diet rich in fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains is essential. Staying hydrated is also critical. Talk to your healthcare provider or a registered dietitian for guidance on proper nutrition.
[6. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT)] The sixth suggestion is cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT). CBT can help you develop coping strategies for dealing with the emotional and psychological aspects of ME/CFS, Long Covid or chronic illness. Consider talking to a therapist who specializes in CBT.
[7. Support network] The seventh suggestion is to seek out and maintain a strong support system. Your support system may include family, friends, and support groups. These individuals can provide you with emotional support and help you manage your condition.
[8. Medication management] The eighth suggestion is medication management. Work with your healthcare provider to find the most effective medications for managing your symptoms. Discuss possible side effects and interactions.
[9. Symptom tracking] The ninth suggestion is symptom tracking. Keeping track of your symptoms can help you better manage your condition. Maintain a symptom diary, share it with your healthcare provider, and adjust your treatment plan accordingly.
[10. Education] The tenth and final suggestion is education. Educate yourself about ME/CFS, including symptoms, diagnosis, and management strategies. Becoming informed can help you advocate for yourself and make informed decisions about your health. Remember that education is an ongoing process, and it's important to stay up-to-date on the latest research and information about you chronic conditions.
In conclusion, managing chronic illness requires a multifaceted approach. By incorporating these ten suggestions into your daily life, you can better manage your condition, improve your quality of life, and find hope for the future. Remember to listen to your body, seek support, and stay informed. Thank you for watching, and take care.
Visit my New Youtube Channel where I hope to make a positive contribution to as many people as I can. The channel is named “CompassionMatters”

I used a translator, sorry if something is not understood.
Boyfriend: Ex 2
Ex: Ex 1
I really wasn't in love with Ex 1, but he begged me to try to have a relationship, he insisted so many times that I got tired and accepted the proposal. The first month was going more or less well, little by little I liked it, but in the second month, he always wanted to have sex when I didn't want to. He would get mad at me and end up making me feel bad to have sex. Whenever we talked on the phone, he ended the calls making me cry, if I wanted to leave before having spoken for at least 2 hours, he would get angry. Basically he did tremendous mental manipulation on me and I had to ask several people to give me their point of view and I ended up breaking up with him, when I broke up with Ex 1 he sent me screenshots that he was cheating on me with another person since the second month.
Ex 2 knew all this situation, he was with me while I cried on calls when my friends wanted to comfort me, and he found out everything he did to me.
After a year I started to have a relationship with Ex 2, I was super in love. I would get angry several times because he would only talk to me for 2 minutes and go off to play, or else he would just answer with "a" or "xd". I had a talk with him and he took it all as a joke but he changed, since he began to talk to me more.
There were several ups and downs, and whenever I tried to talk about it, he would come out with a depressing speech about his past or family, I always understood his reasons and I ended up changing something in my routine so as not to bother him (my friends scolded me several times because they told me that only I was striving for the relationship).
I train 2 sports, so I don't usually go to parties or anything like that to have energy for training.
Ex 2 wanted to go to a party to make friends, since he was depressed because he only had friends on discord. I told him that I was not going to go because I was training and he went alone.
To make it better understood, the party was a UPD (last first day), so Ex 1 was going to be there yes or yes.
After the party, I saw the videos that they sent or uploaded to Instagram, and there I saw him, Ex 1 and Ex 2 together talking. I didn't care about it at first because it seemed like a normal chat, but later one of my friends told me that Ex 2 directly looked for Ex 1 to be with him.
This made me feel uncomfortable and gave me a lot of fear and insecurity, I knew how manipulative Ex 1 was, and I felt that he could do Ex 2 some harm.
When I spoke to Ex 2, I told him that it doesn't seem right to me, and since when does someone's boyfriend become friends with his girlfriend's ex. He responded to all this proud of himself and treated me dramatically.
Then he texted me giving me a depressing speech about him not having any friends and that I can't take that opportunity out of him. I decided not to answer him because I still couldn't believe that he didn't give a damn about how I felt.
The next day I didn't want to see him, I needed to think to know what to do. The bad luck is that he is in the same school as me, so I had to see it everyday.
At recess I was talking to one of my friends to clear my head, Ex 2 came to my bench and I asked him to leave me alone for a while because I wanted to talk to my friend. He took it as a joke and began to say that he was not going to leave and that I could not force him. I asked him again and he continued to be funny, at which point my friend intervened and told him that if I feel uncomfortable, he would have to leave me alone for a while.
That's when he became like a 5 year old kid.
Ex 2 clenched his fists and teeth, he started yelling at me saying that I was a controller who didn't let him have friends, that he thought that people change and that he thought it was stupid that I was angry because he became friends with Ex 1.
As calmly as possible I wanted to explain my point of view, but he interrupted me by bringing his face closer to mine to yell at me, I saw that he half raised his fist and then I knew it was better to leave.
(Something I forgot to say, Ex 2 told me that there were times when he exploded and ended up hitting people, and that happened several times with his sisters and he ended up hitting them)
When I finished school, Ex 2 sent me a message saying again that he think it was dumb that I was angry because he became friends with Ex 1 and asked me for explanations. Already a little angry, I told him that I was not going to answer him by messages, and I told him that its super shitty that he always wants to talk about everything by message.
After that I went to the club to train, when I finished I received a message from Ex 1, he sent me a picture where Ex 2 had his entire arm with cuts and he asked me if he was okay. I just told him that I didn't know, I didn't feel comfortable talking to him.
The next day I was waiting for school to finish so I could talk to Ex 2 and tell him that he needs help because of the cuts. But as he had done to me several times, he did not go to school.
I got angry and began to think about what to do, I wrote to his mother to tell her about the cuts, since I knew that even if I said something to Ex 2, he was not going to do anything. The mother thanked me and asked me if Ex 2 had hit me. I told him that he had never raised his hand to me but he did get violent and nothing more.
After, Ex 2 sent me a message to talk and I told him that I was not going to explain anything and that I wanted to break up with him, he asked me for explanations and I told him that I was not going to tell him anything, we were supposed to talk that day and he did not go.
The next day, when I left the school, he followed me with Ex 1 to ask me for explanations, and as always, he took everything as a joke. I told him everything in summary because if not I was going to send him to hell.
When I told him, he still thought it was stupid for me to get mad because he became friends with Ex 1, so now I feel like I'm really stupid and made a drama for nothing, that's why I ask if I'm really the idiot.
And one more thing, he took advantage of my storys of IG to talk to me so he would complain again about things in our relationship and that I supposedly wanted to get his mom on my side, that's why I blocked him from the networks.

29F, never fit into any group and always been quiet and awkward. Until I discovered alcohol at 15 which unlocked an opportunity for me to ‘belong’ and be part of the neurotypical world. Fast forward over a decade later and I’m now in a position where I am highly alcohol dependant just to function around other people. For example - dating a guy right now who I really like. He’s as neurotypical as it gets. He doesn’t know I’m autistic as every time we meet I make sure I have alcohol in my system so I can act ‘normal’ with him. Then on occasion I slip up, like this morning for example, he stayed the night and wanted to hang around and make me brunch. I was sober after we woke up and then as the hours passed by I was falling more into my shell. I know he could sense something was off - I became quiet, shy, awkward, incapable of keeping our conversations going. Got to the point where we were almost fully silent as I was scared to even open my mouth. For context, when I’m under the influence I’m a completely different person - non stop chatty, confident, outgoing, bubbly, funny. I can’t tell him the truth because I know this is so so far from his world and he wouldn’t get it. He will think I’m insane and never speak to me again, probably. I’m probably going to have to just push him away. I don’t expect anyone to put up with this, I’m a mess. Scared I’ll be alone forever. My body physically can’t handle the alcohol intake anymore, I’m not well. Consuming on average 25 (uk) units a week just to keep this persona going.
I can’t afford therapy. I have tried making autistic friends and that hasn’t worked either. I feel like I just don’t belong in this world full stop. If I had a single wish, it would just to be able to live and be happy and free of this.
Just venting, sorry.

Hey guys,
Today I did something I never thought I could do. I’ve posted about my bf a lot on Reddit to get advice, because I was keeping everything to myself and needed an outlet. My bf and I were together for almost 4 years. He was the love of my life, at least that’s what I thought. He told me we would get married and that he’s never loved anyone like he has me. Our bond was so strong I felt like my soul was intwined with him. I realize now it was a trauma bond. My feelings of anxiety were not normal.
No one understood me like him. He was there for me through some traumatic events and always wanted to be with me and promised an amazing future. He had no female friends, no socials, and only wanted to spend time for me. I thought he would make the perfect husband. I think the hardest part was that I couldn’t accept it was abuse because he wasn’t that controlling. I had my friends, did my things, and he didn’t verbally abuse me unless he was super mad.
The abuse was very physical and mental however. He abused me physically pretty early on in the relationship but stopped for almost a year. I genuinely believe he was going to be the one to break the norm and change. He was going to therapy, changing his patterns, and doing really good. Sadly, the abuse did get worse. He would throw glass at me when he got mad, put his hands on my throat, leave bruises, scream at me, break things, bite me, and say awful things during his fits . I tried to leave many times, but as you guys know they are master manipulators and he was able to get me back many times. I think I dumped him at least 8 times. He would beg every single time
He gave me clymidia in the beginning of the relationship, would ask to borrow money, drive recklessly, could never keep a job , and so much more bullshit. Whenever he would go in his anger bursts, he always made sure to take my phone first so I could never film him or call the police. That right there shows he knew what he was doing. I got extremely lucky the last time he abused me. He ended up hitting a pole because he was driving under the influence. I scolded him because I told him he wasn’t good to drive, and he started choking me. He got distracted by his car getting damaged and left my phone in his front seat. I finally had my phone on me and called the police. I just had a feeling if he took me back to his place he would have killed me.
He is in jail now awaiting his trial. Everytime I left I felt devastated. I felt so lost without him because his love was an addiction. One time I was able to leave for 2 months, but he sucked me right back in. I love him so much and I felt like I’d without him, but I’d actually die if I stayed any longer. The hardest part was that he was soooo good to me the times he wasn’t abusing me. He did help with me a lot in life, I’ll never forget that, but I knew i finally needed to leave after he abused me and I wasn’t even scared. It felt normal. I have bruises all over my arms and jaw, but I made it out alive.
I’m sharing this story because it has been an incredibly difficult four years. A lot of tears, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, and mental breakdowns. I also just lost my grandma who I was super close to so it’s hard right now. He was the most important person to me, I adored him and still do. But now I finally see the light. Yesterday, for the first time in 4 years, I told my mom and a friend what was actually happening. I was afraid they would be mad at me, but they have been incredibly supportive. I know I can make it through. I blocked him on everything (I’ve actually never blocked him before) and deleted all photos. I will probably get a restraining order.
Guys, no matter how much they beg you to come back, no matter if they go to therapy, buy you nice things, sweet talk you, cuddle you, and genuinely seem they are going to change, they won’t. Sometimes you need to keep going back until you are sick of them. Just make sure to leave as soon as you can. I’m glad I finally saw the light. I wasn’t myself anymore and felt like an empty shell. For the first time in 4 years I have my spark back. and I am ready to leave for good. Thanks for reading .
Tl:dr finally got the courage to leave my abusive boyfriend .

I'm not sure how to put this into words in a satisfying way. No matter how I start or what I say after, it doesn't feel like anything I describe or any reason I give is at all what I'm actually trying to say. Nonetheless, I will try again, because posting these things online is some of the best therapy I can get.
My head is always busy with ideas, thoughts, musings, and so on. I debate the point of life. I wonder if I'd prefer people do or don't care if I suddenly went missing. I think about how easy it would be to get a lot of helium and have a nice, long nap, from which I don't mean to wake up. But no matter what I think, be the conclusion good or bad, my heart isn't in it. Do I wanna have fun? No matter what I try, it's at best surface level amusement. Do I want to write or draw? I might lose myself in it, but I don't actually like or dislike doing it. I don't go through with any effort of self-harm or suicide, not because I don't want to do it, but because I either can't or don't see the point. Do I want to study? It never feels like I'm actually studying, and often times I actively study for hours with nothing retained - because I can't put my heart in it. Everything feels like I'm just going through the motions and every day I wish I could spontaneously forget everything, because maybe I would become a better person if I did. I've never cried or felt particularly sad when a relative died, even my beloved grandpa. At most I use his death as a cheap trick to not laugh at jokes. I actively deceive people around me because I don't care either way. The few acts of kindness I can still perform are inherently very selfish - at best a device to forget about my life, or to live the life I wanted through others. I fail everyone around me and can't be bother to care beyond the threat these failings bring. I am an incredibly selfish, lazy and uncaring human being, and true to my nature, I don't care that I'm this way. I've given up long ago. Hobbies aren't enjoyable. Obligations are left unfinished. I let all my connections and relationships slip through my fingers, intentionally, because I don't care for any of it. The few people who still bother with me are those who don't know me well enough, feel obligated to or are too damn stubborn to see the kind of piece of shit I am. And the kicker, the thing that guarantees I will never get better, will never try to get better? Everyone thinks it's my fault. I live in a society, excuse the Joker reference, where mental health is actually a joke, and people who have those issues are looked down upon, bar extreme cases like Parkinson's, multiple sclerosis, and such. Mere "basic" problems like anxiety, depression, apathy, self hate or just the general lack of a will to live are punishable offenses that you either take care of yourself or get beaten, fired, ridiculed or yelled at for. I find, however, that I no longer want to get better. I don't want much of anything, beyond what my body wants, like food, water and sleep. I think I would be entirely fine even if my arms, legs, eyes and anything nonvital were chopped away. At this point life feels little different from that. I feel like I have no will of my own. The only thing I truly do of my own volition are things that help me, if only momentarily, forget that the concept of my own self exists. So books, games, anything that only further eroded my sense of self is the only thing I indulge in. And I know I will continue to do so, untill it finally ruins me. Financially, mentally or physically, I don't know, and as I'm sure you have already noticed, I don't care. This is why I call myself a bad person. There are people who will one day depend on me, like my parents. People who can't help but care for me, like my friends and family. People that might even one day misplacedly look up to me, like my one-year-old cousin. And I don't care for any of them. They could all drop dead this instant and my only worry would be that I now have more obligations to ignore. I'm a miserable, sad excuse of a human being, deserving of all the hate I could get. And still, I won't care.
So. If there is a god out there. I wonder, can he make me care? I sure would hope so. I don't mind if it's something good or something bad. I don't mind even if the world got destroyed this very instant. If it made me care for something, I would gladly endure it. I couldn't be happier if only I could really, finally care for something. Truly, honestly, and fully.

Hey guys, I am a 22f and my bf/ex is a 27m Today I did something I never thought I could do. I’ve posted about my bf a lot on Reddit to get advice, because I was keeping everything to myself and needed an outlet. My bf and I were together for almost 4 years. He was the love of my life, at least that’s what I thought. He told me we would get married and that he’s never loved anyone like he has me. Our bond was so strong I felt like my soul was intwined with him. I realize now it was a trauma bond. My feelings of anxiety were not normal.
No one understood me like him. He was there for me through some traumatic events and always wanted to be with me and promised an amazing future. He had no female friends, no socials, and only wanted to spend time for me. I thought he would make the perfect husband. I think the hardest part was that I couldn’t accept it was abuse because he wasn’t that controlling. I had my friends, did my things, and he didn’t verbally abuse me unless he was super mad.
The abuse was very physical and mental however. He abused me physically pretty early on in the relationship but stopped for almost a year. I genuinely believe he was going to be the one to break the norm and change. He was going to therapy, changing his patterns, and doing really good. Sadly, the abuse did get worse. He would throw glass at me when he got mad, put his hands on my throat, leave bruises, scream at me, break things, bite me, and say awful things during his fits . I tried to leave many times, but as you guys know they are master manipulators and he was able to get me back many times. I think I dumped him at least 8 times. He would beg every single time
He gave me clymidia in the beginning of the relationship, would ask to borrow money, drive recklessly, could never keep a job , and so much more bullshit. Whenever he would go in his anger bursts, he always made sure to take my phone first so I could never film him or call the police. That right there shows he knew what he was doing. I got extremely lucky the last time he abused me. He ended up hitting a pole because he was driving under the influence. I scolded him because I told him he wasn’t good to drive, and he started choking me. He got distracted by his car getting damaged and left my phone in his front seat. I finally had my phone on me and called the police. I just had a feeling if he took me back to his place he would have killed me.
He is in jail now awaiting his trial. Everytime I left I felt devastated. I felt so lost without him because his love was an addiction. One time I was able to leave for 2 months, but he sucked me right back in. I love him so much and I felt like I’d without him, but I’d actually die if I stayed any longer. The hardest part was that he was soooo good to me the times he wasn’t abusing me. He did help with me a lot in life, I’ll never forget that, but I knew i finally needed to leave after he abused me and I wasn’t even scared. It felt normal. I have bruises all over my arms and jaw, but I made it out alive.
I’m sharing this story because it has been an incredibly difficult four years. A lot of tears, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, and mental breakdowns. I also just lost my grandma who I was super close to so it’s hard right now. He was the most important person to me, I adored him and still do. But now I finally see the light. Yesterday, for the first time in 4 years, I told my mom and a friend what was actually happening. I was afraid they would be mad at me, but they have been incredibly supportive. I know I can make it through. I blocked him on everything (I’ve actually never blocked him before) and deleted all photos. I will probably get a restraining order.
Guys, no matter how much they beg you to come back, no matter if they go to therapy, buy you nice things, sweet talk you, cuddle you, and genuinely seem they are going to change, they won’t. Sometimes you need to keep going back until you are sick of them. Just make sure to leave as soon as you can. I’m glad I finally saw the light. I wasn’t myself anymore and felt like an empty shell. For the first time in 4 years I have my spark back. and I am ready to leave for good. Thanks for reading .
Tl:dr finally got the courage to leave my abusive boyfriend .

Hi there,
So.....I've been around this subreddit for a bit, but this is the first time actually writing something. I'm pretty bad at describing myself, but here goes nothing
About about myself:
German, 30 years old and in possession of a masters degree in computer science. I worked on the side as a math tutor though and after a decade of that I am right now in the process of becoming a full fledged teacher and help a lot of students both in their education/careeindependence and some also getting better self-esteem, something I struggled and still kinda struggle myself with.
In my free-time I am mostly a homebody, but I do enjoy going out if it is with someone I like spending time with. Hobbies include videogames, programming, watching shows or spending time with my 3 cats. Or taking hot baths...god I love hot baths...
What I'm looking for might sound a bit generic, but it's things that are really important to me, because several people screwed me over in the past who didn't have those qualities, like trying their best when it comes to communication and doing their best to actually building trust and know the importance of it. There are other things too, but I think most things will be probably easier to figure out in an actual conversation :). Anyway I want something real I guess.
Also I want to mention here that I do not come without baggage. I have a very lonely and cynical past and still sometimes fall into a depressive hole. This doesn't mean that I would want a therapist as a partner, because being a burden is the absolute last thing I would want, but I still think it's important to mention. If you want to see me at my absolute worst then go through my profile, since I used Reddit as my #1 venting place. Tbh one of the reason why I love tutoring so much, is because it gives me the feeling I can help people having a better life than me. So yeah, that means I can also empathize if you might have had some bad experiences in the past too or might be cynical, as long as you want to grow as a person too (maybe even together?). I also want to mention that I need a long time until I feel like I get close to someone. Also while I like working with young adults, I don't want kids on my own, I just want to reach a state in my life where I can truly say that I'm content with everything
Hmm, physically I...need to do more sports. Pic is a bit older, but it is the best I have: https://imgur.com/a/qGMMr4z
Tbh, and I probably shouldn't say this, but I have little hope in this post, but I guess I can't really lose anything by doing it. Thank you for reading this far. Have a cat-pic as a reward: https://imgur.com/fDjT8Ya
You can still message me as long as this post is up.

What if we all identify as women?
I’m more or less a transmedicalist, I recognize that there are people who feel like their body doesn’t match with how they view themselves and want to undergo procedures or to dress up to look a certain way that fit with their own description of who they are..
I can also understand if someone wants to not identify as male or female and be agender or non binary
However the “gender is the social expectations/roles/norms” idea has bothered me recently, this is mainly because there is an important self-ID component that is attached to the gender expression even in a liberal pov: I.e., a male wearing a dress, very feminine and is a house husband who is getting pegged every night is still a cis het man unless they identify themselves as a woman.. if gender is a social construct and they are the social expectations/roles/norms, fulfilling those roles or expectations should grant you the gender, but it doesn’t….
If gender is only a social construct and has no biological value whatsoever, hypothetically we all should be able to identify ourselves as women, if there are no biological or social requirements to identify as a certain gender: gonads or having hormone therapy or surgery or even dressing up, then we can all identify as women without even changing a single thing about ourselves
I really want to see that playing out irl and how would public react to this scenario…
It would be a nice social experiment
What would happen to scholarships? Sports? Toilets/restrooms ??
No more patriarchy, no more Cis het men to vilify
We all will get paid equally

33, male, relatively active, 5'11" (179cm), 190lbs (~86kg)
Long story short, problems with my back culminated in recent months. I did an MRI and it turns out I have severe disc extrusion (I hope that this is the correct translation) at L5/S1. The neurosurgeon that I visited highly recommends surgery (endoscopic spinal treatment) and I'm 99.99% sure that I'll do it. But I'll also be looking for a second opinion since I'm obviously not a professional on the matter.
Therefore, I also wanted to use the wonders of the internet and ask you — should I go with the surgery or try physical therapy?
The procedure isn't cheap but I can afford it and it will reportedly sort out all of my current problems straight away. If I prolong this with physical therapy, are there any other risks? MRI pics below:
https://imgur.com/RL7C676
https://imgur.com/RmwX2h4

I am currently separated and going through a divorce. I am looking for a close platonic relationship with someone that will ultimately end in a LTR. I intend to marry in the future.
My quick facts

• 33, Male, and I live in the eastern panhandle of West Virginia
• Childfree
• INTJ
• A cat dad of 2
• Liberal/leftist
• Atheist
• Introverted and shy, but I can hold my own in a conversation and will talk your ear off once I get to know you
• My love language is physical touch and quality time
• I'm 290, 5'10, bald, short beard, and wear glasses. No tattoos, no piercings. I am comfortable exchanging pictures mutually.
• No drugs, no smoking, but I drink occassionally.

More about me

• I have no problem with chores, including cooking/cleaning/laundry/grass mowing. I like to make dinner together and try new recipes. It is great to do them together!
• I am a foodie and love to cook and grill. I am always trying to improve my steak game, which I take medium rare.
• I am gainfully employed as an IT professional and work remotely.
• Family comes first, and it should be a priority for you. I have no interest in someone who puts their career first or spends long hours at work.
• I own a home and car. I love to travel and take road trips. Sometimes I like to get in the car and just drive randomly down roads I've never been before to see what's there, or just pick a random destination and go there to see what's along the way.
• I love to talk about anything and everything. I love to share the minute details of the day, send memes and funny videos/gifs, and appreciate someone who can respond in kind.
• I play video games, but mostly single player or coop. I do not play anything competitive or multiplayer.
• I do not follow any sports.
• Some weekends I like to spend quietly indoors playing video games, binge watching TV, working on hobbies, or just hanging out. Other times I want to find a new destination and go visit it, visit a museum, go out to eat, go explore nature, or find some fun event and go enjoy it.
• I am affectionate and love to cuddle, snuggle, hug, and touch.
• I want to live the DINK life. Discretionary income is spent on hobbies and traveling.

You/You are

• Aged between 27-37
• Childfree
• Live in the US and willing to travel/meet at some point
• Don't smoke or do drugs
• Atheist/Agnostic, at least no belief in organized religion
• Liberal - I respect your opinion but we're not going to get along if we disagree on basic human rights.
• Introverted or ambiverted, or an extrovert that understands introverts. I do like to go out and do things, but I do not party and do not enjoy large gatherings. I prefer one on one with you and time at home more than anything.
• Affectionate - I like to be close, cuddle, snuggle, and receive/give random touches throughout the day, and receive the same in turn.
• Communicative - I am honest, open, and I say what I mean. You should do the same. If there is a problem, I want to know what it is so we can fix it.
• Love Travel - I like to take one or two week long vacations per year, in addition to several weekends away every so often. I haven't been to many places but I do want to experience them with someone. I have a passport but haven't been out of the country yet, but do intend to go. Sometimes I like to experience something new, but sometimes I want to experience the same place we enjoyed previously again.
• Love Video games - I play a few hours each day and would love to do it with you
• Love cats - I have two. Send me pictures of yours if you have them!

If any of this resonated with you, then please message me! I am open to DMs or chat. If we hit it off, I would like to talk off Reddit on something like Discord (or whatever if there is something you like more). Please tell me a bit about yourself and what you liked about my post!

Sgsflair 1: here --- 90+ Confirmed Trades
Sgsflair 2: here --- 15+ Confirmed Trades (no longer updating)
PayPal region is US.
Please use reddit private messages instead of chat once we come to an agreement
Leave a comment first before PMing or I won't respond
March 2023 Choice:

• Jurassic World Evolution 2
• Hero's Hour
• Demon Turf

February 2023 Choice:

• Fallout 1
• Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous
• Othercide
• Shady Part of Me
• Scourgebringer
• Fobia - St. Dinfna Hotel
• Five Dates

Survival Instinct:

• The Long Dark: Survival Edition
• SCUM
• Starsand
• State of Decay 2: Juggernaut Edition
• SurrounDead

Fighting Farmers:

• Forager
• Kitaria Fables
• Re: Legend
• Serin Fate
• Spirit of the Island
• Stranded Sails - Explorers of the Cursed Islands

In Case You Missed It: Gems of 2022

• Haiku, the Robot
• PowerSlave Exhumed
• Source of Madness
• Submerged: Hidden Depths

January 2023 Choice:

• Encased: A Sci-fi Post-Apocalyptic RPG
• Grow: Song of the Evertree
• Hokko Life
• OlliOlli World - RAD Edition

Black Friday VR Voyager's Pack:

• A Fisherman's Tale
• Acron: Attack of the Squirrels
• Car Mechanic Simulator VR
• Cook-Out
• The Curious Tale of the Stolen Pets
• I Expect You To Die
• Sairento VR
• Shooty Fruity
• SUPERHOT VR
• Until You Fall
• The Wizards - Dark Times

November 2022 Choice:

• Kingdoms of Amalur: Re-Reckoning - Fate Edition
• Shadow Tactics: Aiko's Choice
• Unmetal
• Morbid: The Seven Acolytes

October 2022 Choice:

• Disciples: Liberation
• Epic Chef
• Railroad Corporation

Starlight Children's Foundation Games:

• Day of the Tentacle Remastered
• Full Throttle Remastered
• Grim Fandango Remastered
• Pinball FX3 DLCs
• Star Wars - Knights of the Old Republic
• Star Wars - Knights of the Old Republic II - The Sith Lords
• Star Wars - The Force Unleashed Ultimate Sith Edition
• Star Wars Jedi Knight - Jedi Academy
• Star Wars Jedi Knight II - Jedi Outcast

Valiant VR Bundle:

• Budget Cuts 2
• HARD BULLET
• VTOL VR

2K Megahits Bundle

• BioShock: The Collection
• Borderlands 3 Super Deluxe
• The Golf Club 2019 featuring PGA Tour
• Mafia: Definitive Edition
• PGA 2K21
• Sid Meier's Civilization VI
• WWE 2K Battlegrounds + Ultimate Brawler Pass
• X-COM: Ultimate Collection

LEGO At the Movies Games:

• LEGO Marvel's Avengers
• The LEGO Movie - Videogame
• The LEGO Movie 2 Videogame
• LEGO Ninjago Movie Video Game

September Choice Games:

• Just Cause 4: Complete Edition
• Crown Trick
• Shapez + Puzzle DLC

August Choice Games:

• Emily is Away <3
• Gas Station Simulator
• Omno

July Choice Games:

• Legend of Keppers
• Lawn Mowing Simulator
• Yes, Your Grace
• Atom RPG Trudograd

High Tier:

• 7 Billion Humans
• A Game of Thrones: The Board Game
• Amnesia: Rebirth
• Arizona Sunshine
• BATTLETECH
• Beyond Blue
• Cook-Out VR
• Crawl
• Dead by Daylight
• DMC: Devil May Cry
• ELEX
• EVE: Valkyrie - Warzone (removed from steam)
• Fable Anniversary
• Gears 5
• Generation Zero
• Gods Will Fall - Valiant Edition
• Golf It! x2
• House Flipper
• Hurtworld x2
• Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes
• Kerbal Space Program
• Kingdom Come: Deliverance x2
• Kingdom Two Crowns x2
• The Long Dark
• Marvels Avengers: Standard Edition (might keep)
• Metro Exodus
• Monster Hunter: World
• NASCAR Heat 5 + Playoff Pack
• NASCAR Heat 5 + Ultimate Pass
• No Time to Relax
• Pistol Whip VR
• PGA Tour 2K21
• Phoenix Point: Year One Edition
• Power Rangers: Battle for the Grid
• Project Winter
• RPG Maker VX Ace x2 + lots of DLCs (just ask)
• Rubber Bandits
• Saints Row: The Third - Full Package
• Scythe Digital Edition
• Starbound
• Swords & Souls: Neverseen
• SYNTHETIK: Legion Rising
• Team Sonic Racing
• theHunter: Call of the Wild x3
• Totally Accurate Battle Simulator
• Trailmakers Deluxe Edition
• Trover Saves the Universe VR
• Universe Sandbox
• Vacation Simulator VR
• The Walking Dead: Saints & Sinners
• Warhammer Chaosbane: Slayer Edition
• We Were Here Too
• The Witness

Medium Tier:

• 112 Operator
• Battle of Polytopia Deluxe Edition
• Beyond the Wire
• Car Mechanic Simulator 2018
• Carcassonne - Tiles & Tactics
• Desolate
• El Hijo - A Wild West Tale
• Endless Space 2
• Endzone - A World Apart
• Genesis Alpha One Deluxe Edition
• GRID 2019
• Heliborne - Collection
• House Flipper VR
• Huniepop
• Imperator Rome
• Killing Floor Incursion
• LEGO Batman 2 DC Super Heroes
• LEGO Batman 3 Beyond Gotham Premium Edition
• The Lord of the Rings Adventure Card Game x2
• Memories of Mars
• Never Alone
• Overlord: Ultimate Evil Collection
• Primal Carnage: Extinction
• Quest Hunter
• Rebel Galaxy Outlaw
• Ryse: Son of Rome
• Skullgirls 2nd Encore
• Sonic & All Stars Racing Transformed Collection
• Sonic Lost World
• Space Crew: Legendary Edition
• Splendor x2 + The Cities and Strongholds DLCs
• Star Wars Squadrons (Origin key)
• Street Fighter V
• SUPERHOT
• Townscaper
• Trine 2: Complete Story
• Ultra Street Fighter IV
• Victoria II
• Warhammer: End Times - Vermintide Collector's Edition
• Warhammer 40,000: Gladius - Relics of War
• We Happy Few

Low Tier:

• Act of Aggression - Reboot Edition
• The Battle of Polytopia
• Book of Demons
• Brawlout
• Bridge Builder Racer
• Call of Juarez: Bound in Blood
• Close to the Sun x2
• Detention
• Dirt Rally
• Dungeons 3
• Enslaved Odyssey to the West Premium Edition
• Espire VR
• F1 Race Stars Complete Edition
• Fell Seal: Arbiter's Mark x2
• Fling to the Finish
• Full Throttle Remastered
• Guns, Gore, and Cannoli
• Icewind Dale: Enhanced Edition
• Iconoclasts x2
• Legends of Keepers: Career of a Dungeon Manager
• The Letter Horror Visual Novel
• Lucius
• Magicka
• Mordheim: City of the Damned x2
• Out of Space
• PAYDAY 2
• PixelJunk Monsters Ultimate + Shooter Bundle
• Quiplash
• Rise of Industry + 2130 DLC
• Rise of Insanity
• Sheltered
• Shift Happens
• Small World + Cursed DLC
• Sonic and SEGA All-Stars Racing
• Sonic the Hedgehog 4 - Episode 1
• Sparkle 2
• Supreme Ruler The Great War
• Tannenberg x2
• Tools Up!
• Tooth and Tail
• Total Tank Simulator
• Traffic Jams VR
• Tropico 4 Collector's Bundle
• V-Rally 4
• Vanishing Realms VR
• Vikings - Wolves of Midgard
• Voidigo
• Worms Rumble
• WRC 7 FIA World Rally Championship
• Yoku's Island Express
• Yooka-Laylee

Very Low Tier:

• AER Memories of Old
• Ageless
• Alien Breed Trilogy
• All You Can Eat x2
• Archangel Hellfire - Fully Loaded
• Ballpoint Universe - Infinite
• Between the Stars
• Broken Age
• Combat Wings: Battle of Britain
• Crookz the Big Heist
• Crowntakers
• Crusader Kings Complete
• Deadly Days
• Deployment
• Detached
• Dino D-Day
• Drawful 2
• Earth 2150 Trilogy
• Enclave
• Endless Space - Collection x2
• Enforcer: Police Crime Action
• GoNNER
• GRIP: Combat Racing Artifex DLC x2
• Hiveswap Friendsim
• Homeworld Remastered Collection
• I Am Not a Monster: First Contact
• Imperial Glory
• In Between x2
• Iron Fisticle
• Jagged Alliance 2 - Wildfire + Classic DLC
• KnightShift
• Knights of Pen and Paper 2 x2
• Leisure Suit Larry - Manga Cum Laude Uncut and Uncensored
• Leisure Suit Larry 1 - In the Land of the Lounge Lizards
• Leisure Suit Larry 2 - Looking for Love (In Several Wrong Places)
• Leisure Suit Larry 3 - Passionate Patti in Pursuit of the Pulsating Pectorals
• Leisure Suit Larry 5 - Passionate Patti Does a Little Undercover Work
• Leisure Suit Larry 6 - Shape Up Or Slip Out
• Leisure Suit Larry 7 - Love for Sail
• Love Letter x2
• Magicka
• Men of War
• Milky Way Prince - Vampire Star
• MirrorMoon EP
• Mugsters
• Murderous Pursuits
• Newt One x2
• Nimbatus - The Space Drone Constructor
• Off-Road Drive
• Oh My Godheads
• One Finger Death Punch 2
• Overload
• Overlord II
• Overruled
• Pac-Man 256
• Pesterquest x2
• Porcunipine
• Realpolitiks
• Rebel Cops
• Rebel Galaxy
• Regular Human Basketball
• Save Jesus
• Septerra Core
• Sir, You Are Being Hunted
• Starcrossed x2
• Star Wolves 3: Civil War
• Steamburg
• Sudden Strike Gold
• Super 3-D Noah's Ark
• Swords of Gurrah
• Table Manners: Physics-Based Dating Game
• Tacoma x3
• Talisman: Origins
• Teleglitch: Die More Edition
• Tempest Pirate Action RPG
• Tropico 3 Gold Edition
• The Uncertain: Last Quiet Day
• Warlock - Master of the Arcane
• World War II: Panzer Claws
• World's Dawn
• Xenus 2 White Gold
• Ylands Exploration Pack DLC
• YOU DON'T KNOW JACK HEADRUSH
• YOU DON'T KNOW JACK MOVIES
• YOU DON'T KNOW JACK SPORTS
• YOU DON'T KNOW JACK TELEVISION
• YOU DON'T KNOW JACK Vol. 1 XL
• YOU DON'T KNOW JACK Vol. 2
• YOU DON'T KNOW JACK Vol. 3
• YOU DON'T KNOW JACK Vol. 4: The Ride

Want:

• PayPal (US) -- Priority
• TF2 Keys
• Sacks of Gems
• Steam Inventory Gifts
• Wishlist
• Game offers I plan on claiming

This is my first post to worldbuilding, so constructive criticism is welcome.
The world is modern Earth, but every human can teleport. I've considered how this would impact various aspects of society, and will add more as I write them. My main reason for posting is that I would like to write a novel, but don't have the patience, so I expressly give anybody permission to use my work to create something bigger (novel, RPG, etc) - I'd love to read it!
Basic summary
Everybody can teleport freely. This has been the case for all of human history.
How teleportation works
Teleportation applies only to the person - nothing they're touching. During teleport a person finds a region of low density - air - to swap places with. Teleporting takes energy proportional to the mass at the destination. This isn't generally a problem, but it makes it nigh impossible to teleport into solid or liquid objects. Rain is barely more dense than dry air, with no noticeable increase in difficulty. A typical healthy adult can teleport 20-30 times a day without becoming overly tired.
Teleporting does not produce cool Hollywood-style effects. There is no sound, and a person simply appears or disappears. If they teleport into an area with something in the air, such as rain or dust, this will be transported to where they were, and teleporting into wind can leave a brief gust in your absence. It is generally assumed that travel by teleportation occurs at the speed of light, and modern high-framerate cameras have confirmed this to within 0.01%, but only for distances up to about 8 kilometres (after that, the horizon becomes a problem). This, however, is just the time between disappearing and reappearing elsewhere; in practice it takes several seconds of preparation time.
Travel companies
Travel companies are nothing like what they are today. Transport is essentially for freight only, and the equivalent of commercial airlines or train lines are for luggage to be sent on ahead of a planned teleport, and collected or delivered at the other end. Holiday homes as such are rare, but wealthy people may have small rooms, wardrobes essentially, dotted around the world. Every major town and city has a few designated teleport pads, large open spaces with a soft-play surface and absolutely no structures, even temporary ones.
Clothing and accessories
Since clothes don't teleport, clothing is a status symbol. To wear fancy clothes means you don't need to travel far, you have private transport, or you have access to high-quality clothing at your destination; therefore quality clothing is worn by the wealthy to show off their status, and many people do not wear clothes as a matter of course; this means human population density is much higher in warmer regions, with colder regions having wealthy people and those who need to work there (e.g. scientists and miners). Less wealthy people who wear clothes are typically very near where they live, including those who have chosen not to interact with the world (e.g. shut-ins). Travel companies offer clothing for rent (and disposable underwear) at destination hubs; most would rent bog-standard clothing, often only for a few hours. Millions of parents tire of telling their children to put their clothes neatly away, instead of just teleporting out of them. Like clothing, jewelery and make-up are rare, and tattoos almost unheard of, but scarification and branding are common (though far from universal). These are often used to aid identification of individuals or group membership, both voluntarily and as a criminal punishment. Plastic surgery is difficult, and injuries that require stitches or casts make teleporting problematic; people often take a week or two off work to recover from relatively minor wounds. On the other hand, wounds don't often get infected, as before an infection takes hold, a teleport a few metres away can clean the wound very effectively.
Crime
Prisons don't exist. Physical security to prevent theft boils down to preventing people from retrieving items; a locked door won't stop somebody getting in, but a lockbox too small for a human to fit in might. Physical security that prevents people getting out is more common. Some secure rooms contain noxious gases, either continuously or triggered by movement sensors. But why do people steal? To make use of an item. A furniture shop, with sofas and beds, will be significantly different.
These days, physical theft is less of a problem than information theft. Patents are really the only aspect of our intellectual property laws that took off here; anybody can teleport into your office and read your notes, but they can't legally use them if they're subject to patents. Patent law is far stronger here than in our world.
Murder is at once easier and more difficult than in our world. If a person wants another dead, they can teleport into their bedroom while they sleep and catch them unawares; but they cannot bring a weapon, and will have to rely on their wits. Guns can't be brought in; strangulation is possible, but the victim will almost always wake up and teleport away. Attempted murder, on the other hand, is a lot more common, and you can't replicate what they do on cop shows, asking neighbours if they saw somebody approaching the house. With evidence harder to come by, the deterrent is extreme: if convicted of either murder or attempted murder, the penalty is death. Official and private bounty hunters track convicts down and carry out the punishment themselves, and the hardest part is often taking the body to a law enforcement station to claim their prize.
Teleportation education
Everybody needs to learn to teleport. Babies cannot, and so new parents are quite restricted, especially without the consumer-level travel networks our world has. Toddlers can be very annoying if they start teleporting before learning how to control it. An understanding of the destination is required for accurate teleportation; geography lessons are typically compulsory up to school leaving age, and teleportation lessons include:
Basic instruction:

• How to teleport
• Avoiding hazards (high places, dangerous places)
• Quickly teleporting to a known place (home) in an emergency
• Not ejecting your lunch on arrival

Mid-level instruction:

• Energy conservation
• Etiquette
• Planning ahead

Advanced instruction:

• Teleporting to unknown places (research and exploration)
• Rapid-fire teleportation

Technical details of teleporting
Only humans can teleport. Scientists and priests have pondered this for centuries. Many religious people and organisations believe this is a unique gift from God; but scientists have been trying for years to break it down and figure out exactly what it is that provides this ability. If it can be understood, and then replicated, it may be possible to create teleporters for inanimate objects, truly ushering in a post-scarcity future. But while many theories have been proposed, none have stood up to scrutiny for very long. That said, teleportation research is still a potentially lucrative career path, given the reward to humanity if the problem is solved, and billions are poured into this every year.
Teleportation takes energy, which comes from the individual's personal reserves of chemical energy. Most scientists currently believe each cell provides the energy to teleport itself, although given that not all of a human body is made of cells with energy reserves, this is clearly an incomplete theory and research is ongoing.
Some energy is required simply to teleport, around 100 J per kilogram of body mass. A change in height adds further energy on top of the base, equal to the change in gravitational potential energy: 1 J per metre change per kilogram. Curiously this amount is paid whether moving up or down, and scientists are still unclear where the energy goes when moving downward. For a 70 kg person, this works out to 7,000 J plus 700 J per vertical metre. Teleporting three floors up or down is about 14,000 J, or 3.3 kcal. The additional cost is zero when teleporting elsewhere on the same geodesic, even to the other side of the planet. This means it is easier to teleport to the same height on the other side of the world than it is to teleport upstairs in your own house, and most children understand geodesics by about age 13.
A large height change at once is very taxing. 100 metres is 18 kcal, 1 kilometre is 168 kcal, and the formal edge of the atmosphere, 100 kilometres, is almost 17,000 kcal - one week's recommended caloric intake. While teleporting is banned in most sports, athletics competitions include teleportation events in speed, accuracy and height. The best telethletes can teleport in just under a second (a typical person takes about five seconds), hit a target within 1 centimetre (typical 0.5-1 metre), and travel 1.5 kilometres vertically (typical 50 metres), though post-event recuperation can take a week or so. Recovering from one teleport and preparing for the next takes most people a few minutes, but some practised people can be much faster; the world record from sea-level to the top of Everest is 18 seconds in 6 jumps.
To teleport somewhere, it is critical to know the area. Telethletes' 1 cm accuracy is only achieved with line of sight, and they will study the area before the event. Ordinary people can achieve an accuracy better than 5 cm with somewhere they know very well, like their home or workplace. Major teleport pads are very large, and incoming travellers are cleared off of them immediately. Fortunately, teleporting into solid objects is essentially impossible due to the energy required. People "feel" the area before teleporting, and adjust their aim; schools (and parents) teach children to try teleporting into the ground, and aim gradually higher until they can do it. Aim too high however, and you'll teleport into mid-air. Serious teleport injuries are uncommon, but "teleport knee" is a frequent medical complaint, despite PSA campaigns like "Travelling? Relax!" and "Going on vacation? Bend your knees before you put your feet up!" Another complication is that a person's orientation doesn't change during teleportation, meaning that long-distance travel can leave you lying sideways. Experienced travellers can estimate the destination of others by looking at the angle they tilt their body to before travelling, and compasses and latitude/longitude/elevation markings are as common in public places as clocks.
Travel companies take pains to make their location as clear as possible, and expect (but can't enforce) travellers to book in advance. Since many people opt to go to a teleport hub before travelling long-distance, hubs have large waiting/meeting rooms, and scale models of people at different angles with their city on a sign above them. On the other hand, secure locations like bank vaults are often built at a different elevation and/or angle from the rest of the floor. Rumours that the floors are made of fragile glass with a substantial fall below remain unconfirmed.
Children learn early on that while teleporting can change your location, it can't change your velocity. A person who falls from a large height must teleport to the ground immediately, before their speed becomes too great. Some people set up a crash mat in their home, and practise teleporting onto it with precision, "just in case".
Health problems affect the ability to teleport. Mechanical implants, such as pacemakers or artificial legs, don't go with you; biological implants do, and research is ongoing into producing biological implants for all disabilities. Wheelchairs don't go with you, but can be hired from travel companies. These are not a problem for the ultra-rich who can take private transport; and indeed, being able to spend hours or days travelling is a sign of wealth.
Trade and commerce
This is not a post-scarcity world. For one, there are still limited resources, and they can't be teleported, so logistics problems still exist. And for another, post-scarcity implies that things that are not scarce now were in the past. To the extent that it could be called post-scarcity by us, these people have always lived like this; teleportation has been common throughout human history.
Important infrastructure facilities are guarded much more heavily than they are in our world. A power station will have hundreds of guards, armed with lethal and non-lethal weaponry. The kind of alarm that James Bond might set off is useless if intruders can just teleport away, so instant response is called for. Many such facilities have no front door, though of course they have loading doors for cargo.
Rail is the dominant means of overland transport, and cargo ships over the sea. Private land and sea vehicles are luxury or enthusiast goods, and road infrastructure is primarily pedestrian and cycle paths in major cities, with private taxis from local teleport hubs. People don't commute to work; if they wear clothes at work, they teleport into the changing rooms.
Money exists, and operates much as it does for us. But notes and coins are almost unheard of today. Valuable goods have to be transported physically, but few use precious metals and gems as cash. Money is controlled by centralised banks, and accessed via password.
Historically this came with various problems, and meant trade was almost as limited as it was in our world until recently. In the past, local trade typically used local city-state currency, but trading beyond walking range was as difficult with teleportation as it was in our world without it.
With the advent of global computer systems, people could memorise their usernames and passwords. Of course this meant people would have far fewer unique passwords than we do, and scams were common. Most people now use fingerprints or iris scanners, and recovery of a lost bank account is an arduous process.
Warfare
Resources being in fixed locations, and transport being needed for them, means wars are still a thing. These are curious affairs for residents of our world. Military intelligence is everything. Location on the battlefield is still important, but far less so; a soldier can dodge a bullet as long as they see - or hear - it coming. If you don't take out the enemy with the first bullet, they'll be gone by the time you fire the second. Standard infantry with weapons can be outflanked without warning. A common sight on the battlefield, today and for thousands of years, is a squad of armed soldiers advancing on the enemy, suddenly being beaten and strangled by naked assassins. Point-to-point unarmed strikers are the equivalent of today's marines or yesteryear's ninjas or assassins, and can teleport with a precision of a couple of centimetres. Given the inability to take communications devices with them, strikers rely heavily on intelligence: distance and aerial reconnaissance outdoors, and spotters for enemy bases, who will teleport into a location, quickly memorise their surroundings, and return and relay the information to their comrades. If strikers are the elite, then spotters are the elite of the elite; the skills and training that go into a good spotter mean they rarely risk joining the active assault, and few striker teams have more than one spotter. Other strikers can take on the role if needed but will usually be less effective.
Since there are effectively no nation-states, nation-states don't go to war. Wars are usually carried out between different factions, such as Communities of Interest (see "Political structures" below). Standing armies as described above do exist, but are only a small part of war. Perhaps the most important part is political assassinations. A person designated at-risk by the Assemblies (see below), or a paranoid person with lots of money, will always have armed bodyguards ready to shoot to kill, even watching over them while they sleep.
Political structures
Countries don't exist, or at least not in the way we're used to. Borders can control property, but not people, and it makes little sense for a person to obey a specific set of laws just because they tend to sleep in a specific geographical region. Government is closer to a one-world affair. Rather than communities of geography, people are grouped into Communities of Interest. Each person declares themself to one Community (almost nobody chooses not to); they can change Community at any time, except during the year before the five-yearly election. Communities can be created by anybody, and organise themselves however they like, but they only have any real global power if they have membership of at least 100,000. The election is a simple count of the membership of each Community; for every 100,000 people in a Community, that Community gets one representative in the Junior Assembly (currently 110,000 representatives). Likewise, Junior Representatives form themselves into Coalitions, and for every 100 Junior Representatives in a Coalition, they send one representative to the Senior Assembly (currently numbering 800). Roughly 50 from the Senior Assembly form the Executive Committee to formulate policy, but a majority vote in the Senior Assembly is required to enact legislation. This system has existed in something resembling its present form for thousands of years, and its origins are lost to time.
An exact count of Communities of Interest is not possible due to their fluidity, but political journalists commonly quote half a million. These can include major blocks of tens of millions of people based on religion or broad political principles, special interest communities and single-issue groups with hundreds of thousands of members, minor subcultures with a few hundred people who consider their subculture more important personally than their broader political beliefs, all the way down to families, friendship groups, or even "communities" of one. Only about 12,000 Communities of Interest currently have representation in the Junior Assembly, and while this includes 85% of people, a so-called "direct rep" - a member of the Senior Assembly who is from your Community (rather than just your Community's Coalition) - is the privilege of just 12% of the global population.
There are always some "non-participatory" Communities - those who, due to political indifference, political hostility, or downright apathy, join a Community with the explicit goal of not participating. There are usually a fairly large number of such Communities, each with very small membership; but occasionally one of these can grow to the level of Junior Representation. This most recently happened in 1959, when anger over economic inequality gained the "Just Piss Off" Community 25,000 Junior and 25 Senior Representatives. They dwindled to two Seniors by the next election, and zero thereafter, but their influence is still hotly debated by journalists and political scientists.
There is no single individual at the top. The Senior Assembly forms committees with a specific purpose, and each committee elects a president from their number, but they have little specific power and their position is dissolved when the committee's work concludes. A committee president will generally be the public face of the committee, appearing in public to explain their work, but they have just their own vote during committee meetings. Committees may be a small number of Senior Representatives, but may also invite Junior Representatives and non-Representative experts and members of the public; such people have the same amount of formal power within the committee as the Senior Representatives.
Food and other essentials
Many industries are nationalised. This is not the correct word in a world without nations; the word they use is "Assembled", much to the chagrin of linguists. In particular, food and water are Assembled. These are the only goods which can be taken by a teleporter (provided they consume them first), and it is simply not possible to carry out food production for profit, nor to not carry out food production. Workers in the food and drink industries are paid by the Assembly, and very little food is distributed; people come and take what they want. Food distribution is reserved for restaurants, pubs, and special occasions, and here, payment is primarily for delivery.
The type of food produced is dictated by a standing Committee, based on voting by the Junior Assembly. This gives everybody with a Junior Representative the opportunity to lobby for an increase in production of their preferred food, and many food companies - and in particular, alcoholic drinks companies - have their own Community of Interest with substantial Junior Representation.
Language
I mentioned linguists earlier. Language is a lot easier here. Humans, it is thought, have been able to teleport at least as long as they've had spoken language, and certainly longer than written language. As such there is effectively just one language, although people still tend to live in a particular region, and distinct dialects exist. Still, just about everybody on the planet can understand everybody else. Language evolves over time, and it is unlikely a time traveller from a thousand years ago would get on so easily. That said, they'd have a better time with written communication. Writing is pictographic; broadly, each concept has a glyph to represent it, and diacritics to add nuance. Liberal use of diacritics is commonly seen as a sign of a good education, and a complete lack of diacritics is perceived as crude and vulgar. Other written forms do exist from ancient times, and the written language of today is assumed to have developed as the human population rose, and relatively isolated cultures encountered each other more frequently.
Separate written languages have emerged in recent centuries to express mathematics and science. This was particularly important in early chemistry, as a single distinct glyph for each chemical name quickly become unwieldy. Modern mathematicians and scientists are essentially bilingual, and have developed their own form of non-scientific written communication using scientific symbols. These symbols number only about 200, many originating as chemical elements, and scientific writing is not only unintelligible to the untrained, but also significantly longer; a page of normal writing using glyphs and diacritics, translated into scientific notation, could easily run to twenty pages. Schoolchildren learn the basics of scientific notation, but only those who take advanced scientific study will become fluent.
Religion
A BRIEF NOTE: I am not a bigot. Or at least, I think I'm not; I try not to be. Many people believe in a god, and many people don't, and what I'm describing here is one version of my imagined historical revision based on a world with teleportation. I'm not an expert in any faith, even my own, and there are surely many errors in my historical understanding. The increased or decreased prevalence of a religion in this fictional world is in no way an indication that I think this SHOULD happen; I do not. If you don't like what you read, don't use it. I don't mean to cause any offense, and I apologise if I do.
Religions, as mentioned, exist. There is little difference from our own world in the desire for faith, although there are differences in how religions came about. Monotheism is less common, with many monotheists believing in a divine spirit of the universe rather than a specific individual God. Eastern Dharmic beliefs and Western esotericism have been more popular, and many modern people follow a fusion of the two, called The Path. A minority of Pathists take the name literally, and do not teleport; members of this offshoot are called Walkers.
Buddha existed, and his teachings are more or less unchanged from our world. Buddhists are relatively common.
Judaism does exist, but as the primordial monotheistic faith, rather than a distinct lineage of people. Major events in the real-world history of Judaism include the enslavement of the Israelites and their forty years wandering the desert; this did not happen, and so Jews did not become a tight-knit community, and there is no modern Israel. Today there are a few enclaves around the world, with a third of Jews living in such small groups, and the rest spread among the general population.
Islam is also founded in part on the holding of lands by Muslims and non-Muslims. These events did not happen, and if Mohammad existed, his teachings have been lost to time.
Jesus did exist, and Christianity is very similar. During Jesus' life there were autocratic religious leaders who strictly controlled what the people were allowed to say and do, under penalty of death; although food-poverty never really existed, these leaders lived in luxury at great cost to others. It was this that Jesus preached was sinful. Jesus is particularly noted for surrendering himself to the authorities, in a world where anybody can evade capture if they see it coming. Crucifixion was invented specifically for him. Christianity spread, but not as much, and there is no such thing as Catholic or Protestant; just different flavours of belief.
Atheists are less common. The simple fact that humans are unique in their ability to teleport leads most to believe in something that makes humans special, even after developing an understanding of evolution.
Technology
Technology followed a similar path to our world, with the notable exception of mobile phones. People have cabled computers in their homes and offices, but mobile devices are both less useful and less useable, since you can't teleport with a phone, but you can just teleport back home if you need to use a computer. The internet is just as widespread, and personal cloud computing is even more common; most people have an account with a hosting service, and most computers allow remote logins to access your desktop and files. Internet cafés are very common as meeting places where people can work together on whatever they want to do. Since portable devices never really took off, fixed computers tend to be larger and more powerful.

To say that one waits a lifetime for his soulmate to come around is a paradox. People eventually get sick of waiting, take a chance on someone, and by the art of commitment become soulmates, which takes a lifetime to perfect.
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Let's take a chance on one another and discover what we can build together. Life is short and the possibilities are endless, so why not take a leap of faith and see where it leads us? We may face challenges and uncertainties along the way, but with an open mind and a willing heart, we can create something truly special.
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Hi I'm A...... , my name means unique in English (can you guess it?)
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I am studying Engineering Advanced Technology as applying the knowledge of physics into real world has been a big inspiration for me to take the major. I was torn for a while between pure physics and engineering and in the end, I chose engineering.
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How about you? In what ways do you express what your inside universe is like?
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I love reading poetry and literature whenever I have spare time. I am an avid book reader and also like a healthy dose of philosophy and psychology. My favorite author is Paulo Coelho and favorite read 'The Alchemist'. Which is your favourite book and why? How did it change you?
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How does your perfect date look like? Mine - I'd love to take you on a vintage picnic date. Just me and you on my blanket, listening to The Paper Kites, Sleeping at Last, Hozier. Some lights and food. We'd be laughing and feeling like teenagers again.
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I'll take you to my favourite places too, so grab your backpack and meet me at the bus stop. We'll catch bus that goes to the swiss alps. We'll pick yellow wild flowers and berries. Sneak out from the hut at midnight with a few blankets to keep us cozy while we watch the starry sky, with nothing but fireflies and dandelions around us. Where is your favourite place?
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To summarise - I'm 23 years old straight male, 6ft tall (183cm) dark hair, brownish eyes and tanned skin. We can exchange photos if you send one, I promise I will send you one back
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▪︎I am an empathetic person and I can put myself in your shoes and understand your troubles and suffering and console you the best I can and I'm looking for someone who can reciprocate that as well.
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▪︎I have lived in several countries before , you could say I'm quite an adventurous person, I like exploring different cultures, cuisines and cities.
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▪︎I'm passionate about linguistics and can speak *English, Italian & Urdu* fluently, I can also understand basic *German & Spanish* (Hoping to learn both of these one day)
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▪︎I love memes and I'd love to hear all your jokes. I love puns and cheesy pick up/flirty lines. I'm not as extroverted as I may seem, if I had to choose between a party and staying in my room doing my thing, I'd choose my room.
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▪︎I enjoy video games and physical sports in my free time, I'm more of an outgoing introvert.
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▪︎My taste in music is all over the place, it depends on what kind of mood I'm in but I like melancholic music and sometimes it spirals me into loop of sadness. But I also like pop, jazz, country and instrumental music.
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What I'm looking for?
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- Someone who's funny and we can share memes and laugh. Sarcasm, flirty chats and puns will be appreciated
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- Someone who would genuinely enjoy spending time with me. Would be interested in getting to know me and be open so I can get to know you too
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- Be present, initiative and thoughtful
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- You would like to meet up at some point in real life, and we'll have that cozy first airport hug
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- Someone I can send and from whom I can receive cute good morning / good night texts
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- Someone who would enjoy receiving details from my day /pics, videos, voices messages/ and would include me in his day by sending me selfies/pics/videos etc.
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- You would be interested in having at least one date night a week / watching a movie or playing games together on a video call
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- You'll believe in me, be there for me and fight to be with me
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What I'm not looking for?
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- Someone putting minimal to no effort
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- Someone who'd ditch me and cancel our date to play League of Legends all day
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- Someone still not over their ex from 10 years ago / Emotionally unavailable
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- Liars and cheaters
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- Someone who would see me less than their friends. ​
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If you're wondering what are some of my bad sides:
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- Books and theatre have set really high expectations of romance for me? I
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- I can eat sweet potato fries for the rest of my life, if you order french fries I'd probably eat yours, too
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- I'm a night owl and sometimes I am going to bed around 3am and waking up at noon.
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- I'm an emotional and very romantic person, if you're more on the cold side it won't work out
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What am I offering?
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- To be your best friend. I'll always be there for you.
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- A lot of physical affection, I will love hugging you, kissing you, playing with your hair while I lay on your chest
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- Compliments. You're probably hot af, and really gorgeous. I'll make sure you never forget it or doubt yourself
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- Love you harder on the days you can't love yourself
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- I'll be there for you when it hasn't been your day, your week, your month, or even your year. Clap,clap,clap.
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- I'll read you bed time stories
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- I'll be honest and always do my best to work things out, I'm pretty straight forward and you won't need to read my mind
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- I'll believe in you
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- I'll never give up on you
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So let's build each other up, be the best version of ourselves, let go of the past and live in the present, let's travel and be happy.

Health and fitness are two closely related concepts that are essential for overall well-being. Health refers to the state of being free from illness or injury, while fitness refers to the ability to perform physical activity or exercise.
Maintaining good health and fitness requires a combination of regular exercise, a healthy diet, and proper rest. Exercise helps to strengthen the muscles, improve cardiovascular health, and reduce the risk of chronic diseases such as heart disease, diabetes, and obesity. A healthy diet consisting of whole, nutrient-dense foods is important for providing the body with the necessary nutrients to function properly and maintain a healthy weight. Getting enough rest and sleep is also essential for allowing the body to repair and recharge.
In addition to physical health, mental health is also an important aspect of overall health and fitness. Engaging in stress-reducing activities such as meditation, yoga, or other forms of relaxation can help to improve mental health and well-being.
Overall, maintaining good health and fitness is essential for living a happy, fulfilling life. By making healthy choices and prioritizing self-care, individuals can improve their physical and mental well-being, and enjoy the benefits of a healthy lifestyle.
In addition to regular exercise, a healthy diet, and proper rest, there are other factors that can contribute to good health and fitness:
Hydration: Drinking enough water is crucial for maintaining proper bodily functions and preventing dehydration. The general guideline is to drink at least 8 glasses of water per day, but individual needs may vary based on factors such as activity level, climate, and health conditions.
Stress management: Chronic stress can have negative impacts on both physical and mental health. Finding healthy ways to manage stress, such as through exercise, meditation, or therapy, can help to improve overall well-being.
Social connections: Building and maintaining relationships with others can have positive effects on mental health and well-being. This can include spending time with friends and family, joining social groups or clubs, or volunteering in the community.
Avoiding harmful habits: Habits such as smoking, excessive drinking, and drug use can have detrimental effects on health and fitness. Avoiding these habits can help to improve overall well-being.
Regular health screenings: Regular check-ups with healthcare professionals can help to identify and address any health issues before they become more serious.
By incorporating these factors into a healthy lifestyle, individuals can improve their overall health and fitness, and reduce the risk of chronic diseases and other health problems. It's important to remember that health and fitness are ongoing processes, and require ongoing effort and commitment.

Life has been tough (especially financially and mental health wise) these past few years and it’s looking like one of my best options is to move back in with my parents who still live in the house I grew up in. This is obviously going to be as temporary as possible but it could be 6mo-1 year.
I won’t need to pay for rent or groceries. They are also willing to help me with therapy, a gym membership, and other services to better my physical and mental health. I have worked unusual jobs the last couple years. I would be getting a ‘regular’ job which scares the hell out of me thanks to social anxiety but I would be able to save almost all my money.
I have a great relationship with my mom. She has always been incredibly supportive. My dad is a little trickier because he has never really understood my mental health issues and this has cause riffs in our relationship, but he still supports me how he knows best.
Here’s where my main concerns lie:
-I didn’t have a great high school experience and I am dreading running into people from school. I graduated 9 years ago and was thrilled to get away. Being back in the same area with the same people sounds kinda terrible.
-I am terrified to ‘get stuck’ there. I don’t have any plans as to where I will go next and I don’t want to get a place there just because I don’t know where to go.
-They live in Iowa.. need I say more? Lol. I have been living in a gorgeous valley in BC, Canada and my surroundings can really impact my mental state. Think mountain views, plentiful bodies of the cleanest water & open minded folks vs cookie cutter suburbia with a million chain restaurants & zero geographical features.
-I am 26 and I don’t want them to treat me like the kid I once was when I lived with them.
Anyone have advice on how to manage this transition in the healthiest way?
Also please let me know if there’s a different sub that would work better for this post. Thanks!

Hello. I haven't taken the time to write a game-related essay in years, so you can count this as keyboard diarrhea. TL:DR below.
Across three operating systems (Windows, Mac OS and Linux Mint) and the Switch version over an eight-year period, I haven't taken the time to address traffic, budgets and supply lines while avoiding excessive pollution to such an extent without having my cities fail. Well, on Saturday, March 25th, 2023, after fighting near-bankruptcy several times dues to catering to several college and professional sports teams, I finally reached the final tier for the first time (Megalopolis). For a few minutes I had a grin on my face, saying out loud "FINALLY! NOW I can join the other Skylines fans in that my lazy butt finally got the hang of the systems, knew which policies to use and/or avoid, corrected congestions, connections are solid, and the campus didn't bankrupt the city! YES!" Right after the Heavenly City achievement popped up on Steam, a little while later another achievement popped up (Distinguished Academics, meaning a five-star campus)! Thanking Heaven that the struggle and expenses finally allowed the educational money pit to still reach top-tier, I soon saved the session as two different files and exited the game.
Steam's post-game summary, which I reviewed once I quit the game, was weird...
The game just celebrated it's eighth birthday, yet only 9.5% of players unlocked the Heavenly City achievement, which requires a population of 85,000 which also unlocks monuments. At the time, I knew that there had to be more than that - after all, Colossal OrdeParadox Interactive/Tantalus sold almost thirteen million units across computers and gaming consoles. The Campus-related achievement seemed only weirder - only 1.1%?
Wait, what? Surely other people than myself and a select few have nurtured a university campus and virtual students' needs until they reached the final tier. This couldn't be right - unless gamers just didn't care. Did the majority of gamers skip the campus DLC? Were campuses just not worth the continuous investment? What does this say about other Skylines DLCs?
Then the junior accountant part of me (usually suppressed on weekends when I play games) surfaced. One-and-one-tenth of a percent of 13 million past and present gamers¹ is still a lot, right? Surely the achievements are broken, right?
It turned out to equal 143,000 players, or licenses having earned the achievement. Well (shrugs)...out of thirteen million, it would make some sense. But why so few, besides the fact that caring for a university campus can be downright PAINFUL at times, and before the Campuses DLC was available, players dropped a "generalized" university in the city and called it a day if they wanted to fill the office buildings and industrial administration openings throughout the city. The Campus DLC is also one of the "younger" DLCs (May 21, 2019)² And yet, I saw a shot of a user's campus which was built like a palace on a land peninsula out and nearly over an ocean...(this was before I remembered that the campus must have been built with the Infinite Money mod).
Okay...what about the bigger factor? Out of 13,000,000 units sold, it makes no sense that only 9.5%* of registered copies officially earned the top population-based tier. I mean, reaching that tier is part of the normal manner of playing the game. If a player doesn't screw up, they'll reach the tier eventually.
Except it equates to 1,235,000 licensed copies having recorded that goal*.
This is where the analyzing stopped and my calm, rational self took over.
1) Steam is only counting Steam-based licenses. The total number of units sold is spread amongst PS4, Xbox One S/X, Windows, Nintendo Switch (facepalm), PS5 and Xbox Series S/X, making my calculations invalid. With the pandemic bringing additional players back to the Steam version and Epic store as well as creating a larger console player base (especially now that Cities: Skylines Remastered for PS5 and Xbox Series X/S is now a thing [TWENTY-FIVE TILES without mods!? AAAAARGH!!!^{3 4}). I wasn't able to pull up console sales data easily, but it doesn't excuse the fact that my numbers are off. Thus, it can be said that more gamers have achieved the goals, it's just that we can't easily see it. Then again...
2) "WHO CARES?" Maybe, just maybe, gamers are using this as a more sophisticated form of Minecraft." Knowing that achievements are disabled the minute that gameplay starts with mods enabled, players are simply finding their creativity heightened, zen strengthened and their personal goals realized without the constraints set by the developers - achievements be [expletive]. We see the large uber-metropolises (metropoles?) shown here on this subreddit and others. IRL urban planners use the game as a simulation tool. The water physics are still under constant observation and are exploited in various ways (oh man, who can forget THIS⁶?). And lots of players have the guts to play outside the rules (darn you all with your 81 tiles and enough RAM to run it!) rather than be squares (me, apparently!).
I say all of the above to say this: am I one of the few people still playing within the constraints of the game while others "mod it up" and have fun their way? All these years I've had great fun with the challenge of the game, but am I really one of the few that do so? Is this because of the game's age? After all, the past eight years saw me complete my Bachelor's, move across the country, have a heart attack scare, and stop buying off-the-shelf computers and finally learn to build/upgrade my own. Does this mean I and others who continue to play this way are "hardcore"?
TL:DR - Finally reached the Megalopolis tier after eight years of playing and see my university last long enough to reach five stars. Face fell when I saw the percentages of players who reached the same goals. Incorrectly calculated numbers for data explaining the low numbers. Decided that it's just a game, who cares, and this Reddit post may as well be tissue paper for readers' backsides.
And with that...time to launch Cities: Skylines, buy a new tile, and see if I can build an airport without going bankrupt (probably not) while listening to Christopher Titus's podcast. Thanks.
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Sources (Reddit friendly, so no links. Search by the titles below):
1 - 12m Sales and Counting: What's Behind Cities: Skylines' Building Success? [Games Industry(dot)biz] *NOTE: I padded the number to 13m as the article was written in July 2022.
2 - Cities: Skylines - Campus DLC [Steam]
3 - Cities: Skylines - Remastered [PlayStation Store]
4 - Cities: Skylines - Remastered [Xbox(dot)com]

It started with the loss of a family member and everything spiraled from there. I've always had a difficult relationship with food. I was doing so well until the grief eating kicked in.
For the past few months my mental health has been declining, and with that the control I had over my diet. The weight I've gained as a result is one thing. I find it difficult to look in the mirror now. But it's also the shame, guilt, and disgust I feel surrounding food.
I live with family, and I've developed a habit of ordering takeout and eating it in my room because the thought of eating in front of others fills me with dread. It doesn't help that I don't have the most supportive family either. I'm tired of the negative comments about my appearance, mainly because they reflect how I feel about myself too. I've also been avoiding social contact because I don't want people to see me the way I am now.
I had a good long think about it today, and I don't want to let my relationship with food control me anymore. I know the habits will be difficult to break, I know I need to get back into therapy, I know I have a long journey ahead of me. But I think I'm finally ready to confront this problem and do what it takes to get healthier, both physically and mentally.
I guess I'm hoping for encouragement because all of this is frankly new to me and I don't really know what I'm doing. I'm scared that I'll fail and I'll be stuck like this for the rest of my life. My relationship with food is so tied to my self-esteem and right now it seems impossible to change that. But I do want to change.
If anyone has insight or advice I'd really appreciate it. Thank you.

I've been posting in some other subs but everyone is pretty much unanimously in favor of divorce and says she's still manipulating me and not being remorseful. I'm open to all of that, and it's honestly the direction I'm starting to lean, but part of me is stuck mourning the potential sunk costs. We are both children of divorce and always said we never wanted to do that to our kids and I hate to see them have to go through it too.
My wife had a toxic father who was obsessed with fitness and body image. This imprinted on her at a young age and she and her sisters were anorexic as teens. She got over that as she matured but developed a major fitness obsession that she nurtures for hours a day, even to the point of injuring herself and then exercising on top of injuries.
When I met her 10 years ago she was very athletic but average weight. I'm 5'9 and always fluctuated between 180-210; I was on the lower end when we met, higher 1 year later, middle 1 year after that when we got engaged, back toward the lower end 7 years ago when we got married, and have fluctuated a bit since then but generally (and including for the last couple years) been toward the lower end and sometimes even into the 170s. However, SHE has been really hitting the gym the past 2-3 years more than usual and is now very fit and muscular. Her "sexual market value", as some of the literature would say, has increased. She has started to resent being in the best shape of her life and feeling like she could get all the hot guys she didn't go after in her 20's when she had less confidence.
So, a few years ago, I started to feel her pulling away a bit sexually. We'd have sex, but she didn't seem to want it, and she was not really into kissing me. I also don't know that I ever really felt in our marriage like she was emotionally supportive or there for me. But this was hard, and I talked to her about it many times and she didn't really seem to be able to pinpoint anything. She thought maybe it was because my teeth weren't the best, so I spent like $6K on veneers. Then she said it's my weight. I'm slightly overweight, but nobody in my life would really call me fat and I'm pretty active and athletic. "Well, they don't see you naked, don't you want to look great for me?"
Anyway, about a year and a half ago, something changed. She met our new neighbor and instantly felt an attraction to him. That was around the time when she started commenting more on my weight. She was fantasizing about him and thinking about him a ton, to the point that she commented to some of her close girlfriends about how much she was thinking about him, and started talking about it with her therapist. But, he's happily married and talks about his wife all the time, so we were both a bit disarmed by that and she thought "nothing could ever happen." I was getting friendly with him and we got beers a couple times. He doesn't work (stay-at-home husband with no responsibilities, wife is a high earner and enables a nice lifestyle) and my wife works from home pretty cushy hours, so they found themselves outside chit-chatting a lot. One day we were all outside and ended up planning that he and his wife would bring beers over and we'd all hang out. At the last minute she couldn't make it (trial prep) so it was the 3 of us. We all had a few drinks, he's very charismatic, and was asking us all sorts of questions: what do we do for fun, what gets us out of bed in the morning, what's it like having kids, what do we love about each other...they seemed nice at first, like he was getting us to talk about all these great positive things in our lives. But then there was a little crack when he said something about fitness and my wife alluded to that being a point of contention for us. He apologized and said he didn't mean to touch on something difficult for us and moved on.
That night he texted my wife offering to be there for her "as a friend" if she ever wanted to talk about that stuff. Big red flag. She said thanks. Over the next couple months, they started talking more and more, going on walks together, etc. She confided a lot in him about her feelings in our relationship, while crushing on him. I felt like something was off, so one night after the 3 of us were hanging out, I told her basically, "you're acting like a girl with a crush, I don't think you should be friends with him anymore, I'm not comfortable with it but I'm not forbidding it outright, but infidelity is a line I'll never move on from." She said "nothing will ever happen, have you seen how much he talks about his wife?" I told her, "I don't think it's wise to risk our marriage and our future and our children on your assumptions about what he will or won't do." She was just so certain.
A few weeks later he admitted he also had a crush on her. He told her: "I have had an affair before and it really helped me in my marriage just to find some passion again. If you want, we can have sex once and maybe I can do that for you." Once turned into 6 times and a very intense emotional affair that she fell deeply into that included texting almost constantly and some sexting and some lying to me so they could sneak around. But, he was paranoid about his wife finding out and about 6 weeks later he told my wife they had to stop the physical affair because it was too risky.
My wife was heartbroken over this and I noticed a change in her immediately. After several days I decided to check her phone and found messages between them grieving their physical affair and talking about how difficult it is just being "friends." But, her goal here was clear: she wanted to maintain this emotional affair with him indefinitely and allow us all to get more friendly. He even brought gifts over on Christmas for me and our kids right in the middle of the affair, which pissed her off. She messaged him after that and asked if he's a sociopath and told him not to do that shit again. He also asked a lot of questions about me and our sex together, but he told him not to ask about me or our sex life.
The time since then has been tough. She says she felt like it was a drug and she let it creep up on her because she thought it was harmless because he seemed so unattainable and she never thought he would cheat. By the time she realized it was a possibility she was in so deep that it was heroin for her. She's very apologetic. Says she can't imagine a life without me and that divorce would be so hard on all of us and she definitely doesn't want that. She said she really wants to work on herself so that her feelings of desire aren't so deeply tied to physical attraction, and she also wants to be more physically attracted to me. She says she just has felt for so long like she needs the butterflies and she wants to learn how to be happy and content without them. I do see her doing hard work with therapy, really making an effort to show me affection, and we've been having a lot of sex these past couple months. She also says she's excited about the physical stuff I'm doing and thinks that will help.
Still, I think what she did may have just been inexcusable. I mean, it almost certainly was. I really don't like the idea of being alone and I hate to see our family fall apart and do that to our young kids and to bury the coffin of our dreams together when she's SAYING she still wants those. But, it's so hard for me to think about going the rest of my life knowing she did all this shit, took this for herself, and has this "power" over me of being willing to cheat.
For some background on me... I've always been very emotionally intelligent, earn $250K/year with low-ish cost of living, respected in our community, people are always telling her how great I am and how much I help the nonprofits I work with and how effective I am professionally... So, I'm a great catch, and she says I'm basically the perfect guy minus the fact that I have a small belly.
I guess I still feel like there's a chance she can make the changes in herself she's talking about making. And, I do want to be more fit and have been hitting the gym a ton and I think I can get to a much better place and sustain it. From my reading of much of the attraction material out there, I do think it's possible for me to shift the power dynamic in the relationship by making myself more attractive in general. What I just can't decide is whether it's even worth trying to reconcile. When I type it out, it all sounds ridiculous.
EDIT: I want to also share that I asked her two questions recently and these were her answers.
1) Why did you cheat and what made you able to do that?

I suppose I cheated because I felt like something was missing in my life. I had been feeling like everything was really good except for this one thing (desire, passion, physical/sexual excitement). The thought of cheating neverrrr entered my mind before his proposal. I simply just stewed in my discontent, assumed there was nothing to be done about it, and made you stew in it, too, I suppose. When he offered that proposal to me, when he said getting to experience that one time could invigorate me and help me find that passion again, I think I cut off the rational part of my brain that would lead me to think about you and about what I was actually doing, because then I couldn't do it. It seemed like an opportunity that I couldn't pass up, something solely for myself that would then allow me to move forward without always wishing I had that passion. Because I could experience it and then be done with it. I guess. His rationale - that his previous time resulted in only good things, that we wouldn't blow up our lives, that this was just something for ourselves - certainly helped corrupt my brain, too.

2) What commitments or promises do you make today about the future?

I can make a commitment to not cheat again. To be honest with you if someone does come into my life that could potentially present a problem. To be honest with you about most everything really: about any discontent that impacts me and our relationship, even if I'm worried it might hurt your feelings. To put you and our marriage first. I know I won't be perfect in that, but as long as you hold me accountable and speak up when you feel I'm not being fully honest or putting you first, I can commit to trying my best to refocus.

Just to start i have been a registered massage therapist in CANADA for 5 years, so a lot of what i say and heard will be different than the US. Also i debated on making a post, but the pod talked about massage long enough that i thought it would be valid.

1. Do yall not have benefits? Like a dental plan or something similar that pays for physical therapy? Also 150$ for a 60 min is wild. The average in my city is 99$ for an hour.
   
2. When i heard "massage heights" my bodies red alerts went off. I actually used to work at massage heights in my city and they are a not so great business (at least the canada branch isn't). The membership thing is a bit of a ripoff imo.
   
3. Getting one massage every 3-5 weeks is pretty standard here in Canada. Canadiens are pretty active and for the most part need some physical therapy every month.
   
4. Farting during a massage is completely normal, asking for different pressure is expected, making sure the client is comfortable is literally the #1 thing on our list. If a therapist makes you feel bad like spray fucking air freshener in the room, you should find a new therapist.
   

Fun fact, canada actually exports a loooooot of massage therapists to different cruise lines and resorts all over the world! Ask your next rmt where they got their training!

Idk whether this kind of post is allowed but thought I’d go for it. I’ve been dealing with on and off anorexia (or orthorexia or whatever the fuck people want to label it, just eating far too little/restrictively for my personal health, being anxious about food, feeling like shit, and caring way too much about controlling food intake/my body to the point of extremely poor health and not living life to the fullest) since I was 14 and I’m now 27. I’ve been at a ‘healthy weight’ for many years now since reaching hospitalization-level low when I was 18, but I am not remotely fully recovered.
My hospitalization essentially traumatized me to an extreme level and I never sought treatment/therapy again. This was only a two week hospitalization, so I feel like I never fully nutritionally recovered. I gained weight so people got off my back and I’ve gone through some periods of being normal and happy and healthy and energized, but not for very long. I feel like even with gaining weight my body’s really fragile and it’s reserves are very low. I’m at the point where I don’t really need to gain weight anymore and pretty much feel like I’m at my set point because even when I do go for it and eat to my heart’s content for a while my weight stays the same, I just feel 100x better. But most of the time I don’t eat enough, and as I get older the side effects from this get more and more uncomfortable.
For emotional and physical reasons, I don’t want to give into my compulsions to restrict anymore. I’m just wondering if there’s anyone out there like me and if you’d like to connect, just to stay positive, talk about all the things in life we want to have our health and energy to do, and be a source of support and friendship.
No one in my life has any idea at all how I’m still struggling, so this would be really helpful and nice for me.
And to anyone else reading who’s not ready to recover, sending you tons of love and support as well.

Hey all you ladies,
i just wanted to ask you how are doing mentally? Im still doing chemo therapy and had the 4. round of taxol/carbo and keytruda feeling physically ok but in my head im starting to freak out by all that fear i have in me. Im going to speak with others in a Support group and seeing a pychologist but im so afraid of getting metas even if the CT in the beginning of chemo said i don't have them. Also i thought keytruda is giving really a benefit. What do you think about that? I feel so sad and full of fear what could happen next. It's just that i can not think about something else than the worst outcome even if there tones of better outcomes and the doctors said it is douable. Please tell me how are coping with all that... Send you all hugs and hope.